Tuesday, March 9, 2010

RAJ - CARMEL - 1986


QUESTION:  My question is about relationships that break up.  Having my own experience and I have never spoken to anybody who went through a relationship breaking up without mental, emotional and some people with physical pain.  Is there something we need to know about this?  Surely we’re not doing it the right way with all this pain.  And what effect does this have on the physical body if any?
ANSWER:  It is not the breaking up with someone, the separating of ways that is hard on the physical body.  It is the emotional reaction and the resistance within oneself to flow easily with the parting of ways that becomes registered physically as pain and distress and dysfunction.  It is very seldom that a separation occurs peacefully, because the conscious intent behind a relationship has been to maintain the relationship. 
In fact, most relationships are approached from the standpoint of lasting forever.  And when the realities of individual growth make it obvious that remaining together permanently will not work, it flies in the face of the conscious intent of the partners and the emotional investment that each have made. 
And so, there is a radical reorientation that must occur.  And this is not usually done willingly, because one is not looking for a harmonious, easy separating of paths.  At that point one is usually wanting to still attempt to maintain the ongoingness of the relationship and is emphatically attempting to employ guilt to bring the errant party into line so that the concept of permanence will be maintained, whether it is an honest maintenance or continuation of a relationship or not.
You, not specifically you, but everyone tends not to be interested in taking an honest look.  Because honesty very often doesn’t coincide with one’s mindsets.  One would rather maintain a lie and keep his “dignity” than be honest.  In other words, the attempt is to serve one’s ego, rather than the peace and natural harmony of individual growth.
Now the simply fact is that many relationships break up because the ego is paramount, and each member of the relationship is serving the other’s ego as well as their own, rather than valuing the individuality of each member of the relationship and allowing the space for growth and unfoldment to occur.  So the very thing that contributes to the break up of the relationship is what also contributes to the distress that is experienced in the break up.  That is not to say that all relationships are supposed to be permanent, that is just to say that the status of the ego is what tends to get in the way of permanent relationships and it is what contributes to the stressful breaking up of a relationship.
Whenever you are resisting what your being is unfolding you will experience distress and discomfort.  And if you do not pay attention to the subtle, gentle distress that first appears and you continue to resist, the distress will increase until it is manifest bodily, until you arrive at a point where you cannot ignore it and have to take a look at what your being is unfolding and agree to flow with it, rather than trying to hold to your concepts, your mindsets, your personal well-developed goals based on what you think is right.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
QUESTION:  I’m wondering how does one adjust after losing a mate through death?
ANSWER:  In some ways this relates to the first question.  It is very easy in a relationship to think in terms of being a couple, where individual identity sort of submerges and constantly yields to the set you have become—like salt and pepper shakers—where the individual contribution of the salt or the pepper becomes overlooked in whether or not the set of shakers is silver or poetry, or glass with shinny silver tops, and how it will look on the table, how the team will look in the community, etc. 
And yet, in spite of the fact that there has been a joining together and a commitment, each member of the relationship remains a whole Souled individuality who is growing and is not apart of a set, and who is not there to serve the other partner, but is there to learn to be himself or herself totally. 
When the valuing of the relationship overrides the valuing of one’s individuality one surrenders his individuality and brings less and less of that which is of value to the relationship, and the relationship begins to suffer.  One begins to feel more and more incomplete in himself or herself, and thus when a death occurs or a separation occurs one is confronted with his feeling of inadequacy.  And that is why there is most often a mad scrambling to get another partner to replace the missing half, and there is little wisdom used in finding that new partner.
Now, your partner is gone, but you are not.  And you are still and always were a whole-Souled woman, a whole-Souled individuality.  It is out of the completeness or wholeness of your being that a partner manifested in your experience to identify that which meant wholeness to you.  Your wholeness is still present.  None of your essential being has disappeared.  And your being at this instant and at every instant is still intent upon manifesting its infinite completeness. 
Therefore, if you wish to move forward gracefully you will begin to be attentive and curious to see just how in the world your Being, with a capital “B”, is going to unfold and manifest that which identifies your completeness in terms of companionship and in terms of committedness and in terms of sharing. 
You see it is out of the wholeness of each individuality in a relationship that value is brought to the relationship and fulfillment is experienced within the relationship.  Because from that standpoint neither one of you sucks from the other, and depletes the other, and obligates the other to be the source of fulfillment. 
You literally stand at the threshold of fulfillment, every single one of you does at every moment.  But when there seems to be a significant loss it is hard to remember that you are still standing at the threshold of fulfillment.  Nevertheless you are.  And if you are observant and curious and interested in see how that fulfillment is going to manifest itself, you will not overlook it. 
I am not suggesting that you hurry now to find a new partner, but do not delay unnecessarily to be open to that kind of unfoldment.  It will not happen until you open up to it and say, “Okay, I am willing, I am ready.”  You are the boss.  What I have pointed out to you is that you are on the threshold of fulfillment and you can afford to and you can dare to be alert to that fulfillment manifesting itself in language that you can see and comprehend and find meaning and value in. 
It has been my intent in this answer to set a new tone for you, so that you are not as likely to look back at what you had and by contrast to that impress yourself with how little you have now.  You have as much or as little as you are curious to experience.  And I encourage you to let your curiosity grow. 
QUESTION:  (Cannot hear the question.  It has something to do with having trouble staying centered.)
ANSWER:  You are not the only one in the room who has been experiencing this lately.  And so I am going to specifically address everyone, even though I am specifically answering you as well. 
As one begins to value being centered more than the exciting dynamics of conflict and struggle, there are naturally slippage’s which occur causing you to arrive at a point of inner peace and the experience of some degree of stability and then suddenly losing it and being caught up in the ego drama of fear and anxiety and stress. 
But in the last three weeks there has been an additional dynamic and a great deal of the uncentering that has occurred has not had a direct relationship to one’s ability or lack of skill in remaining centered.  There is very simply a shift, a positive shift of enlightenment occurring around your globe.  It is fundamentally constituted of individual growth and enlightenment in mankind.  But understand this, you are not alone.  And as any progressive step is taken in your clearer and clearer experience of what is real and your valuing of what is real you automatically have the support and the, let us say, moral encouragement of your guides as well as from the entire Brotherhood of man that is already totally Awake. 
A threshold has been crossed over during the last three weeks.  As I said, it is a progressive step, but it is a step which is very frightening to the ego.  And as a result as you have all noticed the ego has reared its head, expressed its fear in violent terms through particular individuals and particular incidence.  
Now it is imperative for you to understand that the source of the conflict and fear is not Khaddafi.  He is as frightened as you are and is expressing it, more so than the rest of you, and more publicly than the rest of you. 
At the bottom line each one of you suffers only from your own ego sense, no one else’s.  And it is the degree to which you energize your finite, limited, tiny, ego sense that you experience great fear, depression, physical discomfort and disease. 
No one else’s ego sense can do anything to you if there is not a corresponding string in you that can vibrate sympathetically with the other’s ego expression.  There is no such thing as influence that is not invited by you by virtue of having a resonant sounding board in you.  If this were not so you would be lost, and you would have reason to truly be depressed.  Now this is an absolute fact I am stating here.  If there is not something in you to resonate to a limited, finite, negative viewpoint or belief system or feeling external to you then you will not experience it within yourself no matter how distressed another might be. 
If you understand that fact you understand your power and your authority over your experience.  And it becomes crystal clear that you cannot be an innocent victim.  Ah, but there were innocent victims on that plane that fell to their deaths.  And so why am I to feel that I might not be an innocent victim, out of the blue, totally unexpected?  How can I feel at peace?  But you see that line of though contradicted what I just said, there cannot be an innocent victim.  Those three, even though one was a child was a participant in the drama, an active willing participant.  There was something in them that collaborated with the fearful ego sense.  And they had the authority within themselves not to participate.
Now I want you to notice that the way the ego works is to pull your attention away from the simple the fact that you have two vantage points within yourself to experience life from.  Those two vantage points are either the ego’s conflicted distressing sense, and the other is your eternal, immovable, stable, loving, principled Being, with a capital “B”. 
The ego distracts you from the awareness that you have two choices that will totally govern in opposite ways the way in which you experience your life.  And it says, “Look out there, look at what happened, look at those innocent victims.”  Assumption after assumption, after assumption is going on there, which if you are not careful you will not challenge, and the ego will have you hooked, your gut will clench up and you will not sleep well, and you will wonder whether to make a trip. 
And you will forget the fact that if you take a trip, and if you take a plane from here to there, it is you who are taking the plane, it is not the plane that is taking you, and that if you are not allowing the ego to take you over and you are not synergizing or sympathetically responding to the current of fear that is acting out these incidence, that you will be unable to get on a plane that will not reach its destination, or conversely that someone who intends to do harm on a plane that you are taking will be absolutely unable to carry it out. 
Because you see, your connectedness with your peace, and your insistence upon not energizing the debilitating disintegration of your inner self-experience has no opposing presence or power because it is omnipotent.  Your peace experienced within yourself is omnipotent.  Not because you personally have a marvelous power, but because that peace in you that constitutes the substance of your Being and the nature of your Being is the presence of the Life Principle or God.  That is why it has power.  That is why it is transformational.
As this year progresses there will at times be increasing attempts on the part of the ego sense to create fear.  That is nothing new.  That is the way the ego has always functioned.  But it is losing ground.  And so, it is wildly taking steps to increase the level of fear and engage you in a conflicted place in yourself so that you forget to choose for your peace.
Your appropriate response is not, “Go get Khaddafi, kill the bastard.”  That is to join into the ego’s drama.  Your appropriate response is to remember that you have two vantage points, from which to experience your world and then make the choice.  And if you choose for the ego you substantiate it, and no transformation is possible. 
But if you choose for your peace with the understanding that your experience of it is the experience of the presence of the Life Principle, and that for you to be that experience of that presence is your only true function.  And that performing that function is literally to be the light of the world, because you are being the presence of that which transforms and does not strengthen the ego sense, then you will make the contribution that counts.  You will have responded appropriately. 
And each one of you who chooses to respond appropriately by turning the other cheek, will contribute mightily to the shift of consciousness which mankind is entering into.  You see, turning the other cheek is not a matter of being a doormat.  It is not to say, “Oh, you hit me, hit me again.”  There are two cheeks.  And for clarification the one is the ego sense and the other is your Being.  And when someone comes at you with the ego do not return the ego, turn the other cheek, respond from your peace, respond from your capacity to love unconditionally.  And this is a capacity you have to love unconditionally when you are not in the reactive ego state.
As the months go by in the remainder of this year, I encourage all of you when you do find yourself unexplainably upset, when nothing is going on in your immediate experience to cause you to feel anxious, guilty, blamed, hated, defensive, be very quick to ask yourself first of all, “Is this me?  Is this my stuff?  Are these really my issues?”  And be willing to consider that maybe they are not, other than the fact that there is a density in you which is harmonizing with or sympathetically vibrating to a fear in your world.
The more quickly you can discern that it is not yours, the more quickly you will realize, “I don’t have to put up with this expletive.”  And in that recognition will come a great deal of freedom, and you will be able to move on out of that feeling with more ease. 
This is a subject we will get into further as the weekend progresses.  For now that is the answer to your question.
PAUL:  Okay the question had to do with the speed up of consciousness, or the speed up of breakthroughs and boundary breaking generally.  And then as to what significance’s Carmel and Pacific Grove and the surrounding area might have, or what part it might play in that.  And whether or not perhaps the Carmel area itself geographically is in some way contributes to... whether it’s a power point.  I’m just repeating this so that it’s clearly on the tape.  Whether the locality itself is contributing to this accelerated pace.
ANSWER:  Very simply the accelerated pace is due to the fact that there are more and more individualities who are disengaging from the limited ego sense, who are significantly opening themselves up to an understanding of life that goes beyond traditional concepts as well as beyond the data which the five physical senses provide about life. 
You see, as each individuality loses density, let us say, in terms of belief structures that are ignorant and false, the density of all mankind is lessened, thus making it easier for others to experience a greater confidence as well as more easily remember who they really are, and what they really are.  Because as there is less and less ego distraction it is easier to feel the nudge of one’s Being, to feel the insistent pressure that is there to wake up.  And so, each individuals growth becomes compounded within the whole. 
The amount of real enlightenment which is being experienced today is much greater than any of you is aware of.  The media is not interested in reporting on it, and most individuals are being very quiet about it, because when it happens one is not sure that he is not going crazy, and so he does not publicize his enlightenment.  But nevertheless he values it and nurtures it for the most part, and continues to grow until it begins to evidence itself in his life, and the quality of life begins to change.
Geographically speaking, Carmel is a hotbed of, let us say, spiritual phenomena.  Part of it is due to the weather, in an environmental sense because one is not faced with survival as relates to the elements, and there is a source of inspiration in the simple beauty. 
There is an energy vortex in the Pacific Grove area.  It does not contribute heavily to the hotbed that I spoke of, but for those who are near it it does contribute to, you might say, a clearer head or a clearer mind.  The contribution to the acceleration of the shift of consciousness comes primarily from the individuals in this area rather than from the geographic locality.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
PAUL:  Why do the entities who are speaking to us seem to be masculine rather than feminine?
ANSWER:  The fact is that there is not an imbalance or a disproportionate number of masculine entities, it is just that those who have come to your attention have been masculine rather than feminine.  Guidance is coming from both masculine and feminine entities.  Preference is not give to males.  That’s the end of the answer.
QUESTION:  (Cannot hear the question clearly.)
ANSWER:  You are, yes.  And although you have been distracted from time to time your attention has been significantly placed.  Do not be impatient with yourself.  Watch for the tendency to “naturally” think that you should be doing better.  This is not as affirmative as you might think, because its impact really is one of negating yourself and saying, “I am not doing as well as I ought to be.”  You keep yourself under a level of stress this way by always feeling that you are not measuring up.
I will tell you something, you are always as far forward on your leading edge as you can be.  And if at times you think you can see that the leading edge is four feet in front of you, and you think you should be up there, and you cannot get any further forward than where you are, where you are is where your leading edge is, and not the spot four feet ahead. 
Value where you are at all times.  That does not mean to dig in and stay there for a lifetime, but it means stop putting yourself down for being where you are.  It is the furthest forward you have ever been.  And if you could move one centimeter further forward you would.  But you are not likely to until you relax and allow yourself to value the place where you are, and not use it as a means of putting yourself down or putting the screws to yourself to force yourself to move a little bit further forward. 
You cannot force your way into the Kingdom of Heaven.  You can’t force your way into enlightenment.  You must allow and love yourself forward, which requires you to be appreciative of yourself in the now where you are.  In effect when you are not appreciating where you are you are not allowing your full weight to be on the spot where you are.  And until your full weight is on the spot where you are you do not have the balance to lift your foot and place it further forward.
Very simply, let us say, you are doing an outstanding job.  You are doing well.  Dare to acknowledge that within yourself and feel good about it, because it is what will free you up to move forward. 
I cannot help but be pleased with you because it is so obvious to me that you are doing well.  It is sort of like you looking at a seven year old, chubby little girl, sitting at the piano trying to play a piece that she has learned to share, and she is so concerned about whether she is doing well enough.  And you are able to look at this little girl sitting at this big piano and hear ability and talent and desire there and delighting in it, even though she is nervous and all caught up in her concern that she might not be doing well enough.
You are doing beautifully.  And it is important for you to know that.  And when you can do better you will do better.  But what you are doing now is already better than anything you have ever done before.  So keep that perspective and appreciate yourself.  Okay.
QUESTION:  About employment.
ANSWER:  There is nothing I can do to relieve you.  You are up against some very strong feelings within yourself which it is difficult for you to release, and yet the releasing of them is what is necessary.  Last night I used the word willingness and the word yield. 
The dynamic here is not the job or the specific work you are doing, it is an inner thing that has to do with letting go, giving up, yielding, and flowing with what meets the human need, and loving or beginning to love to do what meets the human need.  It is an inner struggle, rather than a struggle with your employment, or the specific activities of that employment. 
You have 10,000 arguments, “Yes, but how can this paperwork possibly be the evidence of divine love in human experience?  Yes, but aren’t there other things I could be doing that would be the presence of divine love in human experience that would nourish me as well?”  You see, at the bottom line, it is a willfulness to have what nourishes you.  And that is not unconditional love.  It is the provision of what meets the need of another that constitutes the expression of divine love.  And it is the expression of unconditional love that is nourishing to you.
PAUL:  Okay, this is me.  I wish I could remember...  I may have the name of the river wrong, but...  Oh, no I don’t.  Somebody came to Jesus and I think he was blind or something, anyway, Jesus told him to go and bathe in the river Jordan three times.  If that individual...  Now my understanding is the river Jordan was a common river, a river where common people bathed in.  It was not a river that people of higher social status bathed in.  And if that person said, “Yes, but isn’t there a better river for me to bathe three times in,” he wouldn’t have gotten his healing.
It was a matter of yielding in that sense, of not holding out for what he thought would be best, or maybe more appropriate, or maybe more fulfilling.  The healing came from the obedience, rather than from the specific river to bathe in, or the specific activity that you have to do.
ANSWER:  Your capital “B” Being has your ego right where it wants it.  And your Being has you right where your fulfillment is precisely present to be experienced, else I would tell you that there were alternatives, and help you discern what they are.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
PAUL:  Okay, the question is, in so many words, if we’re to let go how do we do that and still remain responsible?
ANSWER:  Letting go is the releasing of the exercise of willfulness.  Willfulness is constituted of actions that are carried out without bothering to be sensitive to the underlying divine order of things associated with your life and your environment. 
One does not just let go.  One lets go and listens.  One releases the conditioned sense of what being responsible means so as to be quiet enough to sense into the divine order that has to be going on if there is any conscious experience being experienced at all.  If you are conscious of anything something divine is happening.  If you are experiencing anything it is the presence of the Life Principle unfolding itself infinitely.  And so, at the bottom line, what you want is to be able to be quiet enough to be sensitive to what this divine event is so that you can cooperate with and flow with it and be at one with it.  And therefore, not at odds with it. 
Now if your individuality, your conscious experience of Being is the presence of the Life Principle experiencing itself, then this divine event which is unfolding has to be somewhat constituted of what you are, because you and the Father are one.  And so, when you are allowing yourself to let go and listen, and sense into the divine Reality, you are sensing into something of yourself.  Not something else that you are yielding to or turning yourself over to.  This constitutes true responsible action.  And you will come to find that when you were “being responsible” and totally ignoring the underlying Reality you were as far away as you could get from truly being responsible, and that the problems you ran into were evidences of your irresponsibility.
Now, you do not simply let go and sog in bed all day long doing nothing, staying out of the way of life, not interfering.  Realize that if indeed you stayed in bed all day so as not to manipulate life in any way, you would be affecting life.  Because there would be a line at the grocery store where someone was one step closer to the cash register than they would have been if you had been there.  You cannot exist without participating in life even if you are stuck in your bedroom apparently not doing a thing.
Now, another important point.  Until you get some clear inner guidance and clarity as a result of letting go, do not give up using your common sense.  Do not say, “I am not going to do anything today until the hand of God evidences to me what I need to do, because I want to be sure that what I’m doing is absolutely responsible and right from a divine standpoint.”  At some point you’ll need to go to the bathroom.  And you can afford to use your common sense and get up and go to the bathroom without making a mess that has to be cleaned up later.  And that is wisdom.
You will need to eat, you will need to prepare something to eat, or go out and get something to eat.  And that will be wisdom.  Not everything about you is foolish and useless right now.  And so, use your highest sense of principle and your clearest sense of intelligence, and use your present skills in the way that you have learned does work best.  And in addition to that listen.  Let go.  And when you have a clearer answer than the one your past experience can provide you with, go with that new information.
When you are at the grocery store and you are having to decide between Cherrios and Wheaties hesitate a moment.  There is only one you are going to take home with you as far as you know, and so one will be more appropriate than the other under the circumstances.  Just hesitate a moment, inquire within, “which is most appropriate today?”  And then listen.  And then whichever one is indicated take.  You might find yourself occasionally being told to get both when there seems to be no reason for it, and upon arriving at home finding out that you have company, and you’re going to see that you needed the additional breakfast food and it will make sense.
My point is this.  Inquire often during the day.  Let go often during the day, even if it is momentarily.  Let go and do not assume that you know the answer as a result of your reasoning and past experience.  Momentarily inquire.  And act upon the response.  And you will find that you will be able to make a gradual and natural transition from you old sense of responsibility to, what from the old sense will be irresponsibility, but which will really be acting out from a constant consistent inner knowing or guidance.
Letting go gives you the opportunity to find out at an experiential level that there is a oneness and an orderliness to the infinite fabric of being, and not any one activity is too mundane or too inconsequential to have a place in that fabric.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
PAUL:  Excuse me.  He says we are please to have such beautiful entities to help.  What is unfortunate is that you can see ours, but it is difficult for you to see yours.
QUESTION:  With all this help, isn’t it easier to grow now without pain?
ANSWER:  It is easier but it is still difficult, the reason being that the ego does not perceive enlightenment and clarification as healthy.  Because it threatens and actually will end up destroying the tininess of the ego sense, the presence of the distorted ego sense.  As long as there continues to be an identification of one’s essential being with this tiny ego sense, the destruction of that tiny ego sense will feel like your destruction, and therefore you will resist it.  And yet, at the bottom line, what you are resisting is the emergence of your essential capital “B” Being.  And so it constitutes a state of self-denial.  And that will always hurt.
Part of the process of waking up is beginning to discern the difference between the ego sense and yourself, the discovery that the ego sense is not you, but is your program.  As you begin to be able to say, “oops, there goes my ego again,” and you’re able to say that more and more often, the very act of making that statement will constitute a clear experience of your separateness from that little ego sense. 
You will still have to listen to it wine and cry, but it will not hook you as significantly.  And because there is a clearer and clearer sense and experience of yourself apart from the ego, you will begin to value yourself or that experience more and more and you will insist upon being in that place where you can experience it more and more.  In doing that, you will withdraw your energy from your ego sense.  You will not energize it, and its complaints will become weaker and weaker.
I did say that pain is not essential to growth.  I also said that it very often is contributive to it.  Understand that when you are up against pain, you are really up against a limit of a belief structure, a limit of conditioned thinking, a limit which it is time for you to move through and become free of. 
So instead of kicking against the pain and complaining about it and fretting yourself because of it, let there be a recognition that you are up against some artificial boundary, some limitation that it is time for you to move through and become free of.  And then let your desire be to move right through it.  And let there be an authorization within you that says in effect, “I authorize the release of whatever conditioned thinking is present that would keep me from moving through this and experiencing my freedom.” 
If you are willing to insist upon the experience of your wholeness, you will be able to move more gracefully through that boundary with less stress.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
PAUL:  You’re talking about putting energy into promoting a crafts program in the elementary grade levels and then perhaps being involved in the teaching of them?  Okay.
PAUL:  Okay, I’m going to have to put this in my own words.  The overview is that it is appropriate for you to push for it and get the ball rolling.  It is not likely that you will end up actually teaching once it gets rolling you’re not likely to end up actually involving yourself in the teaching part.  There’s a definite sense of about two years down the road of there being some new point of departure for you, some new area of interest that will take you away from the school setting.  But you are the appropriate one to engage in putting the energy necessary into getting the ball rolling, even though someone else will carry it on out into practice.
Attend to what is at hand and what you do see to do it does need your energy and full attention.  For whatever it’s worth it’s not a departure from this plane.
QUESTION:  (Cannot hear the question, but from the answer I believe someone asked if Jesus had spoken to them.)
ANSWER:  It was me, yes.  And you heard it quite clearly, and therefore I will not repeat it.  Pay attention to the feel you were experiencing when I was speaking to you.  It will help you to recognize me at any future time when I may have something to share with you.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
QUESTION:  (Cannot hear question clear enough to convey it.)
ANSWER:  You are learning to flow with and from your center which is always creative.  It is the artificial interference of the ego and the attempts at power which blocks true creativity.  Self-expression, with a capital “S”, is always the uninhibited flow of creativity.  That is why it always constitutes a genuine gift to your world.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
I’m aware that part of your question wasn’t answered.  Do you want to pursue that?
QUESTION:  (He is pursuing the question further.  I still cannot hear it clearly.)
ANSWER:  You are not likely to find that opportunity crystallizing into form.  And that will be a part of your learning to flow as well and be passively active, which means to be a nonmanipulative part of the unfoldment of the fulfillment of your Being. 
Observe that you are resisting acknowledging fully the things that are happening as a result of your flowingness, because it is different from the format you have come out of.  What I want you to be especially aware of is that your Being will win-out.  And so, I encourage you to look with eagerness and inquisitiveness and interest and amazement at what your Being is actually unfolding and manifesting in and as your experience. 
You are still having the opportunity to yield even more significantly to your Self, with a capital “S”.  And you are doing quite well, but there is more benefit to be gained.  There is more of the peace that comes from letting go even more waiting for you.  And it is that which is the pay-off, let us say, rather than the acquiring of this particular job opportunity.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  Your individuality is whole.  And a part of waking up is discovering that the masculine and feminine natures are inappropriately and ignorantly separated, and that your experience of being a female in nature, emotions and form constitutes an incomplete experience of yourself.  Within that delusional sense or experience you have experienced being masculine and feminine, male and female in a number of lifetimes, but you have never ceased being the completeness constituted of the oneness, the integratedness of those two natures.
Now I want to make it very clear, that if you are presently female, or if you are presently male the aspect that is currently absent, is not embodied in another individuality, in another dimension or time.  This absent portion is present in the 98 percent of you that you are not currently accessing and consciously experiencing.  It is present right where you are, just as the Body of Light that constitutes your manifest identity is present right now, which I can see, but which is not obvious to you. 
You’re not forever destined to be female and destined to be male.  Each of you is destined to wake up to what you have always been, which is an undistorted completeness, period.  That’s the end of the answer.
PAUL:  Okay, you would like to have some help with some problems that your 12 year old daughter is having right now.  What is her first name? 
ANSWER:  More than anything, praise her.  She needs someone to see her worth and value, because she is having difficulty seeing it for herself.  She is having difficulty being confident.  She is also being overlaid, or we could say overshadowed by a sense of running out of time, a sense that she had better hurry up or she is going to miss her chance. 
To whatever degree you can communicate to her that there is not a final deadline, no matter how much she is being impressed with the idea that there is.  And the more you can help her to know that there continue to forever to be opportunities to move into a fuller experience of life, you will help to reduce the fear that is grabbing her that says, she had better make it now or she will ruin her life before she’s even 14.
PAUL:  This is me.  Is she having difficulty with school?
PAUL:  The picture is one... It’s like maybe for you and me, it was like, if you didn’t make it through college life might not be too good for you.  And it’s like somewhere along the line it’s gotten moved back down, it’s like if you don’t make it in high school you’re destined to a mediocre life, and then it’s gotten moved down to junior high so that this sense of pressure that you and I weren’t confronted with until it was time to make a decision about college, the kid’s are feeling in junior high.  And it is a sense that is being laid upon them by the school systems.  And it’s not true.  But there’s a great deal of fear that she’s going to mess her life up at 12 years old.  It’s sad. 
It’s like a responsibility is being laid upon her that she’s not even supposed to be thinking about yet.  And it’s like whatever level of concern you husband may be expressing is supporting the validity of that idea that she has in her mind.  It’s like it’s substantiating it.  It’s like if it weren’t really true Mom and Dad wouldn’t really be like their being. 
And it’s like one way or another you’ve got to find a way to communicate to her, it’s like, do the best job you can today.  If you get a C or if you... I mean it’s like if everything goes wrong it won’t be the end of the world.  If at 24 you don’t know what you want to do yet, or you haven’t made it, it’s not the end of the world.  You still are standing at the point where you can make it, even though you know that at 24 it’ll be harder to do because of the demands that we made on a 24 year old than it is now. 
It’s like the point is to communicate to her, like was said earlier, we’re always standing on a threshold, we’re always on the threshold of fulfillment, and that it isn’t a do or die thing.  She isn’t going to make or break her life by the grades she’s getting in music or history, that there is a continuity of her individuality that will be uneffected by how well or poorly she does this semester or in junior high. 
Do you see what I’m... that there’s something essential and stable and permanently ongoing, and that’s her.  I mean, she is permanently ongoing.  And that at anytime in her life that she sets her mind to a task to accomplish, she will have the opportunity to do it, even though her teachers have said, “if you don’t do it now you, you won’t have another chance.”  That fear has to be dealt with, because it’s like at 12 years old she has been impressed with the idea that she could very well not do some essential thing and miss out on success and happiness in her life.
You need to know that she’s petrified.  And that her behavior is a reflection of her being very afraid that she’s going to fail in life, that she could actually miss the boat.  I’m putting this in my own words, but this is the sense.  Okay, that’s the end.  I said is there anything else, and he said, not at the present time.
PAUL:  Okay, so the question is whether or not your daughter and you moving away from the situation would be helpful?
ANSWER:  Yes, it most definitely would.  I encourage you not to move rashly, but be open to the steps that will unfold.  The moment you open the door in your mind to that as a viable step to take.  The way to do it will begin to open up, it will be intelligent, it will be reasonable, and it will not be full of stress, you will not have to go out on a limb to do it.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  It will be a final settlement, yes.  And you should not settle for anything less than this being it, the end, finis.  You can always tell when you are flowing with and in alignment with what your Being is unfolding, because in your heart of hearts you will be at peace.  There is always a feel to being on track or on target.  And it is a feel that is there even if your rational thinking processes call it into question.  And even if your friends tell you that you are being a fool, be willing to pay very close attention to your deepest feeling. 
You see, your own mind, your ego sense will argue against your deepest levels of knowing.  But when your ego is addressing you there will always be in the pit of your stomach a sense of anxiety.  Whe your ego is speaking there will never be an experience of the peace of your Being, they are unable to coexist together.  Of course, this requires an investment of trust in your in your deepest level of knowing.  But if you are willing to trust what arises out of your peace, you will always find what you do eliciting or bringing forth harmonious completion and fulfillment.
Now I encourage you in this particular case to stick to your guns, to proceed as you have been.  And do not be willing to overthrow your deep sense of what is right for the opinions of others.  And when this procedure is consummated walk away from it, leave it behind you, release it, and be glad to be through with it.  I know you won’t have any trouble being glad to be through with it.  But the point is let there be a significant release of it.  And attend to your life with gusto.  Okay.
ANSWER:  The panic last night was the result of the fear of the unknown, yes, the standing on a threshold.  Now I can guarantee you that always on the other side of a threshold is more of you.  And therefore, the crossing over that threshold is always a movement into a clearer, less conflicted, less bound experience of yourself and life.  Stepping over thresholds is a wholizing movement or process.  It is always a movement into a more significantly integrated experience of life, of you. 
However, when you are standing at the threshold, which is an ego boundary, your ego sense says there is nothing on the other side of that threshold, that indeed there is a void.  And that if you step across you step into insanity, you step into emptiness, you step into the unknown.  And of course, the unknown is perceived as being fundamentally negative and destructive, and this is because the clarity and the integration that is experienced is destructive to the old ego concepts, and therefore the old ego sense. 
The ego projects upon your enlightenment images, fearful images to keep you from going Home, to keep you from experiencing your peace and your wholeness.  The ego thrives on your fear, it thrives on your endarkenment.  Therefore, I encourage you always to delight, if you can, being at a cusp or threshold, because you literally are standing at the edge of a clearer self-experience, and an experience of your world with less distortion in it.  And although it looks like an empty void you will find in taking the step over the threshold that there is solid stable ground.  And that solid stable ground is constituted of your integrity.
Your ego was panicky last night because it recognized that you were willing this weekend to conceive of something beyond your present frame of reference, your present conditioning.  But fortunately your ego was not in control, because you’re here.  You acted out from a desire to move forward, in spite of the fear. 
The digestive upset this morning was one last attempt on your ego’s part to create enough fear that you might bow out of the weekend, but you held firm.  There is no direct relationship between the dynamics last night and this morning, and your movement into healing work, other than the fact that you are going to be able to look back on yesterday and today and see that a shift was made, and that you did move beyond some old conditioned thinking, and you did not die, and in fact are experiencing a new level of integrity.
In this way you will have learned a significant lesson about dealing with boundaries, and the nature of your Being.  And this is what will contribute to you being able to move into healing work, because you will be able to more clearly appreciate the real dynamics of boundary breaking, which those you will be working with will be confronted by.  And you will not join in with them in their fear.  And you will be able to support them as they dare to reach beyond their present sense of things.  Okay.
ANSWER:  Very simply, the image or images which one utilizes to define himself or his condition are enhanced and substantiated by repetition.  The repetition constitutes the development of a fixation.  And so the fixation is a mindless rehearsal of an image, a self-image, an image of one’s world, an image of one’s relationship.  It is hypnotic.  It is a repetitive process which can only efficiently be accomplished in privacy.  It therefore, involves a withdrawing from external inputs.  It constitutes isolationism to whatever degree is needed in order for the image to be maintained and substantiated.
Touch in a normal sense is helpful, but not sufficient in distracting the highly focused mindless repetition of the image.  But touch that is in effect a direct expression of love and an intent to heal cuts through the mindless repetition and touches the individual in his Soul, thereby, strengthening his or her Soul sense. 
When that happens, it becomes impossible to maintain the isolated attitude or dynamic.  The individual is drawn into a relationship, a connectedness with someone else.  His Soul sense is enhanced and spontaneously comes into play.  He feels again, from the level of his being, instead of reacting to the mindless repetition of the image of conflict or limitation.  And thus, the image changes and begins to reflect the qualities of Soul that are inherent in his individuality.  Thus his self-image in transformed, or his image of his world is evened out or transformed.
Touch is not always essential, but in some cases it is.  And in the work that you are doing this is what happens.  Okay.
ANSWER:  If the image, the conflicted image is one of long standing, then there is, as it were, heaped upon the top of the habit negative self-feelings, rather like sludge.  Therefore, when the touch is utilized and the Soul is connected with and there is movement and emergence the sludge, you might say, surfaces first as the habit is released.  But underneath the anger or the violence is the movement of Soul.  And you must remain with what you are doing in terms of touch until the sludge abates.  It may seem like it will go on too long for you to be able to practically be there, but I guarantee that that is an illusion.  And your willingness to hang in with that individuality will not take an unreasonable amount of time.
Once the pattern, once the habit has been broken there is no structure to contain the sludge, the conditioning, you might say, and therefore is spill over and runs off quite rapidly.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  It is not so much that there is a change coming, which you are sensing into, it is that there is something in you that wants a change to occur.  And the dynamic is this:  When you first began this work, it was by choice.  And you were not required to do it.  But recently it is something you have had to do, and you had no choice about it.  And the sense of freedom and joy began to wane because it was a necessity for you to do it and not a matter of free choice.  Part of you doesn’t like that.  And that part of you wants a change as an expression of essential freedom so that you do not feel trapped into a situation. 
It will be dangerous in the sense of being impractical for you to pursue a change, because that is not what your Being is unfolding.  It is however likely that it will only be for about eight more months on the outside that you will need to do this work.  After that the sense of obligation and pressure will be gone and you will once again be in a position of doing this work simply because you choose to, and without the burden or weight the element of joy and pleasure will return. 
Be aware that there is another element here also, and that is that the ego sense which is expressing itself or defining itself as impending change in you has as its goal an underhanded attempt to manipulate your husband to get his derriere in gear.  This is not malicious, but it is coercive, and it is inappropriate. 
There’s also part of you that is at peace with what is happening in your life, and in which there is an inherent sense of confidence and hope and a feeling that things are really not out of kilter.  And I encourage you to pay more attention to that sense, it is clear and it is accurate. 
As I said, within a maximum of eight months you will be “out of the woods,” and a more normal perspective will settle on the scene of your marriage and your life.  Be reluctant to act on this feeling.  And be reluctant to energize the frustration that has been growing.  That’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  You will not be able to do it in a more structured environment that you came out of, no.  That does not mean that there will not be structure.  But you see the way it works is that form follows function.  And when function is confined to form there is always tension, and the movement of life becomes coerced into less and less movement because the form doesn’t serve the movement.
Now it is not likely that everyone will experience the presence of this love that you are speaking of by the end of this decade.  At least they will not be feeling it for what it is.  Many will be experiencing it as threat, because they identify themselves so completely with the ego sense which this love will be dissolving.
I encourage you to stay in touch with this love.  And I encourage you to understand that this love is the infinite presence of your individuality, and that there is nothing passive about it whatsoever.  That it is a movement, and that movement is a movement into expression.  And therefore, you need to be attentive to movement within you and in paying attention to that movement you will begin to discern the form, which it will be evolving for its self-expression. 
Now its self-expression is your self-expression.  And so in being attentive to it you are being attentive to your Being.  And in your willingness to flow with and take the steps necessary for the form to be evidenced, you will find yourself being active in the world with structure, but structure that is serving the form because you are not preoccupied with the structure, you are preoccupied with the Movement of your Being, the Movement of the love that constitutes you.  That’s the end of the answer. 
PAUL:  Have you since that meditation have you had any conversations with your guide, and do you address your guide as Ron?
He says...
ANSWER:  No, there was no misunderstanding and you heard correctly what was given to you as your guides name, which is Ron.  And it happens to be pure coincidence that your fiancee’s name is Ron also.  There is no significance there.  You can rest assured that no matter how unclearly you pronounce your words, or how poorly you are able to formulate your questions, the meaning, the intent behind the question is clearly understood by your guide.  That’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  It is not appropriate for you to think of making any kind of change at the present time.  For the time being, and I mean by that through the end of this year, maintain the status quo.  That’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  Then let it happen.  You are so very close to experiencing it that in a way it is amazing it hasn’t registered with you.  Because your guide has addressed you. 
Now I encourage you not to be reluctant to let the words form in your mind.  In other words, the words will not form outside, you might say, of your mind.  Your mind will move, you might say, when your guide speaks.  That is why in the beginning it is difficult to be sure that you are not making it up yourself. 
Do not be so conscientious at not interfering, or not participating from a human level that you do not let a movement occur in your mind.  And when it does occur dare to trust what you hear, or dare at least to play along with it until you have enough experience to justify a clear judgment that it is or is not you.  Again, you are so very close to the experience.  And you need to know that.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
PAUL:  Step One:  Become still.
Step Two:  Mentally express your desire for dialog with your guide.
Step Three:  Listen.
Step Four:  Expect an answer!
Okay, I’ll go back to step one:  become still.  Raj, has explained that this can be done through meditation, contemplation, visualization techniques, self-hypnosis relaxation techniques, or even soaking in a hot tub.  In other words, it doesn’t have to be a complicated process.  Whatever allows you to relax and significantly set aside your cares and concerns of the day.  You can dare to say, “I’m going to take twenty minutes, the world will not collapse around me if I don’t worry about it for twenty minutes.”  And just take that time to become as centered as possible.  It isn’t necessary to become perfectly centered.  It is only necessary to have relaxed somewhat significantly, let’s put it that way.
Okay, step two is mentally express your desire to be in touch with your guide.  You only need to express the desire once at any sitting, any twenty minute period, lets say, that you sit down to specifically try to get in touch with your guide.  Don’t repeat it over and over and over again.  Express it once.  Express it gently.  Because if you’ve done a meditation and you’ve become centered and then you try to yell it out into the universe so your sure your guide will hear you.  It will set up unevenness and rip open and get you out of that centered place. 
So let it be gently and soft.  But feel it, experience the desire to be in touch with your guide.  You don’t have to use fancy or formal words.  Many of the nights when I was trying to get in touch with Raj, I just said, “If there are such things as guides, and if I have one, will whoever it is please speak up.”  So just in whatever way it comes to you to express it in your mind not out loud.
Then step three is listen.  Now if you’ve been doing a meditation and you’ve been using a mantra, or you’ve been using visualization techniques, or self-hypnosis relaxation techniques where you’ve been using words and so on, obviously when you went to step two you had to stop doing that so you could express your desire to be in touch with your guide.  When you get to step three the listening, do not resume the mantra or the imagery or the words, just abide in the quietness that you’ve arrived at in step one.  Just continue to stay in that relaxed quiet place, with an attentive attitude. 
It is extremely important for the attitude to be one of “Thy Will be done.”  And I don’t mean that in a Biblical sense as much as a recognition that your guide knows the best way to connect with you so that you will hear it and so that it will have some significance.  So allow for your not having enough perspective to know exactly what is the best way, and let it happen on your guides terms.
One of the things this does is that it keeps you from bringing willfulness or coerciveness into the listening process.  Communication with your guide occurs at subtler levels of consciousness than the ones we employ usually in your day to day living.  And one of the things that keeps us out of that subtler level is our willfulness, our attempt to be in charge, to be in control. 
So the quieter you are and the more allowing you are of the response from your guide, it’s like the more of your ego you’re leaving outside of this quiet space.  And he’s indicated that to whatever degree you become coercive or manipulative you will distance yourself or push away the contact or the dialog. 
Now when I was starting out I went for two weeks.  And every night I sat down and I was like becoming centered for about ten minutes and then I would take the balance of an hour just to be in the quiet space listening.  And I was doing it because I was in a real dire circumstance for me, and there was a part of me that was really sincerely wanting help.  And that’s one reason I did it for so long each night.
But after about two weeks I began to feel like, “hey I’ve been a good boy.  I’ve really put myself out.  I’ve left a good fifty minutes for you to talk.  You haven’t said anything.  I don’t have forever to sit here waiting.”  In so many words it was like, “if you want to talk to me you’d better hurry up.”  And I did not get an answer from him that night.  But one of the things that I do feel that some communication occurred, because at that point it’s like the fact that I was becoming manipulative there became apparent to me.  And it also became clear to me that I would postpone communication by doing that.  There had to be a willingness not to be in control, not to be in charge while I was trying to get in touch with my guide.  It was about three nights later that I had my first conversation with him.  But that’s an example of coerciveness.
Okay, and step four is expect an answer.  Raj has said that you can sit and listen forever and not hear anything if you’re not expecting an answer.  That doesn’t mean the answer won’t be there, but you will tend to overlook it.  So expect an answer.
Now has Raj has said that two things happen when you express a desire for the first time to be in touch with your guide.  The first thing that happens is you’re guide rejoices.  The second thing that happens is that your guide immediately begins to work with you to break through from the other side of whatever it is that blocks communication.  You have to put forth your effort by desiring it, that’s your part of it.  And then your guide works with you from the other side of whatever blocks it, helps clear out garbage and debris, so to speak, that blocks the communication. 
So you can know that you’re not doing this all by yourself.  It feels like, or at least to me it felt like I was sitting in my room all by myself sort of beating my head against the void, and feeling a little foolish like if somebody could see what I was doing and giving my time to they’d think I was crazy.  So you can know that you are not doing it all by yourself. 
It is your guides desire to be in touch with you, because in relationship to you that is your guides function.  It’s not your guides only function in life, but in relationship to you that is your guides function.  So you can count on it that your guide isn’t going to sit around twiddling his thumbs or her thumbs while you’re trying so hard and not join in.
Now your guide can be either male or female.  It is a good idea not to preconceive what it will be.  Our oldest daughters boyfriend wanted to get in touch with his guide, and I had told him it could be male or female.  And later on I found out that when he went out the front door he just knew his guide would be a male. 
And he tried really for a teenager, he tried very consistently for three months.  I mean he really was diligent, and nothing happened.  And then finally one day he heard my daughters voice, except that it was like a voice in his head.  And it was his guide.  And after about three days she stopped using my oldest daughters voice, and then he heard her voice.  And he asked her why it had taken so long.  And she said, “because you were listening for a male tone, or a male feel, and whenever I spoke you absolutely disregarded it.”  Until she finally use our oldest daughters voice, and then that got his attention.  So he had blocked it for almost three months, and really frustrated himself, because he really was sincere about it.
So which ever it is it will be absolutely appropriate for you, whether it has a male tone or a female tone.  Also don’t compare, don’t say, “gee whiz you don’t sound like Raj, or you don’t sound like Ramtha, or you don’t sound like Joann’s guide, so therefore you must not be a guide.”  I have found that there are guides who have a great sense of humor, I mean are really funny, where Raj is to my sense more conservative, but not without a sense of humor. 
The interesting thing was that with one person in particular, his guide is a real joker you might say—it’s a female—but always the jokes have a double meaning.  They’re funny in themselves but the other meaning that they have always has a very deep spiritual or it brings out a point that is significantly enlightening, and it’s absolutely appropriate for this guy.  But for me I think I would not feel as comfortable with it. 
So the point is your guide will be absolutely appropriate for you.  You may not get long discourses, long complicated explanation that may be crystal clear to you, but nevertheless lengthy.  You may get very short answers that are to the point and you get it and you’re able to go on with things.  It’s like the whole thing is a practice in allowing, a practice in letting it be what it will be, and experiencing the benefit to whatever it is.  So be careful not to compare.
The one thing that everybody says to me after it happens and they very often they’ll call up and say, “will you check with Raj and see if I was really talking to my guide?”  And when they find out yes that they have, the first response is, “it’s so much easier than I thought it was going to be.”  The actual happening is so much easier than they thought. 
And so I make a point now of sharing with people that when you are taking time to sit down, and you’re feeling like it’s difficult, or like you’re getting nowhere and there must be something more you need to do, if you will assume that it is easier than anything you’re anticipating it will help you to relax a little bit more and let go.  If the anticipation of it being hard that sort of gets you tensed up mentally, and the need is to relax and to allow it to happen. 
Okay, that pretty well covers it.  It isn’t any more complicated than those four steps.  There are not some people who are more talented than other people, or more ready for it, like they’ve earned the right, or they’ve come far enough along their spiritual path to be able to do it.  The only prerequisite that you have to have arrived at a point where you are sitting down and saying, “I desire to be in touch with my guide.”  You’re motive doesn’t even have to be particularly high.
My youngest daughter got in touch with her guide when she was 14 because she wanted help on a spelling bee.  And she got in touch with her guide, didn’t win the spelling bee, but she did get in touch with her guide.  It is an absolutely natural phenomena.  And age doesn’t have anything to do with it, education doesn’t have anything to do with it, skill doesn’t have anything to do with it.  At the bottom line, it boils down to desiring it and letting it happen, allowing it to happen.
The one other thing I will share is that my experience of it—and that of others that I’ve talked to who have gotten in touch with their guide—is that experientially it’s almost identical to saying a poem in your mind, where there’s a flow of words that mean something, except you didn’t have to go through any process of figuring out what the next word was going to be.  Okay, it’s just a flow of words.  It’s just like he said to you there is a movement in your mind that feels just the same as saying the “pledge of allegiance” in your mind.  So don’t be so conscientious to be uninvolved and not interfere that you don’t even allow the formation of words in your mind.
Also because it doesn’t feel radically different, and therefore you are not likely to be sure that this really is your guide and that you’re not making it up.  Be willing to play along with it on the chance that it isn’t you.  And I mean be willing to play along with it for three months. 
It took me about 90 days to begin to be able to actually tell a qualitative difference between when Raj was speaking and the feel of my saying a poem in my mind.  Of course, there was the material I was getting was not the typical kind of thing I would normally think.  But there began to be a qualitative difference, it was recognizably Raj.  So give yourself time to have enough experience to be able to tell the subtle differences.  That’s very important.
Another thing is, don’t require absolutely correct answers.  In the beginning there’s a lot of doubt, you’ll find that at times you will begin to insert yourself, or you’ll sort of bias the answer.  You’ll listen but as the answer goes along you’ll sort of give it a little twist of your own.  And if you’re smart, you’ll catch yourself and say, “no, I don’t want to do that,” and you’ll stop. 
When and if you begin to bias it in any way, or if you’re unusually tense, you will not hear as accurately.  And so if you say, “what’s going to happen tomorrow,” and you get an answer and it doesn’t happen tomorrow, don’t chuck the whole thing.  Because there’s a skill at listening that you acquire as you go along, and part of it has to do with investing trust in the whole process, trusting into it and not exercising as much active doubt. 
At this point if somebody calls me and says, “I’ve lost my watch can Raj tell me where it is,” I get really tense.  And I know the reason is that because the minute I relay to them where he said it was they can walk to that place and look, and if it isn’t there they know right away that I conveyed it wrong.  And so I feel vulnerable. 
So what I do is I know that the only way that the accuracy around that will increase is for me to relax.  So I let them know that I don’t feel comfortable with this, and that tends to get in the way of my hearing clearly, but because I want to become comfortable with it I’m going to go ahead and do my best. 
And interestingly enough probably seventy percent of the articles are right where I got that they were, right where Raj said it.  But if I required it from the beginning those kind of answers to be accurate I probably would not have hung in long enough to have developed enough trust in the process to hear with significant clarity.  So be willing to hang in with the process and don’t require absolute accuracy. 
The illustration Raj gave of that is a child learning how to walk.  And if he says, “I won’t take my first without holding on until I have a guarantee that I won’t fall down,” he’s going to have a hard time learning how to walk.  But the child who says, “it’s okay to fall down,” and just picks himself up and tries against, that child will learn a whole lot faster by not requiring absolute perfection at walking from his very first step.
So that pretty well covers it.  It’s fundamentally simple.  And my experience is that the only thing that really got in my way was my doubt.  But hanging in in spite of it has moved me faster.  Okay.
QUESTION:  Would doubt be your ego?
PAUL:  Oh absolutely.  Yes, it told me that I was just accessing a much more creative part of myself than I had ever accessed before.  It told me I was going crazy.  It told be that because I was going through the collapse of a business that I was just psychologically compensating for a great sense of loss and was creating this whole hallucination.  It ran me over the coals.  The only thing was that I really was getting some significant help, and that help bolster my courage.
ANSWER:  Ultimately divine love is the only force—the only force.  It is the substance of everything—the constituting substance of everything.  Every single object you see in this room is love, the energy of love in form.  It also is literally, light.  Love, the energy that is love is light.  It is illuminated and illuminating.  And the simple fact is that this chair and this carpet and the floor and the ground and every single form you see is literally a communication of love to every other form. 
You exist literally in a sea of the Movement of divine love.  Therefore, when you contemplate divine love, and I mean by that allow yourself to be open to its experience you are opening yourself up to the communication of love that surrounds you and constitutes you.  You are putting yourself in alignment with everything that Is.
Now the simple fact is that very often in a group setting, the sense of numbers makes it safer from your present point of view to be open.  Because you do not really grasp the significance of divine love, its potency, its presence as the only violable power there is.  And you are as afraid of experiencing love as you are of experiencing your Self, with a capital “S”.  Because from the ego frame of reference it is the “unknown,” as I mentioned earlier.
And so literally it is in groups where there is safety in numbers that you are most able to open up to the experience of presence of divine love.  What you experienced is just a taste of what the presence of love feels like—and I mean divine love.  Not only that the taste you felt of it was not just the taste of divine love in your world, because at the bottom line divine love is the substance of your individuality. 
And so you were having a clearer experience of your nature, a clearer experience of what constitutes you.  And that is why I can say that you are quite beautiful.  And that you are worthy of self-appreciation.  And that you should never think less than the best about yourself.  Because in spite of your willingness at times to be distracted from being aware of who you are, in spite of your thinking less than the best of yourself, you never stop being what you were experiencing during those 15 minutes.  You cannot stop being what you are, even though you can ignore it.
Where you give your attention is what will be magnified in your experience.  And if you give it to the ego and the sense of conflict and the sense of fear that it provokes and you energize that and give that your attention, that is what will grow upon the thought until it consumes you and scares you so badly that you have no choice but to reach beyond it.  And of course the only thing that is ever beyond it is the clearer experience of yourself.  The only thing ever present on the other side of a limit is the more of you that exists but which you haven’t been paying attention to or accessing. 
This is why it is wise to give your attention to things like divine love, to give your attention to the meaning of God, to give your attention to the meaning of you, divinely speaking.  Because when you give your attention to these things they are what will grow in your thought and be magnified. 
And that is literally what you were doing that evening, you gave your attention and allowed the experience to grow, to become more apparent to you, to register more significantly at your conscious level of experience.  Okay.
ANSWER:  You have already take the first step.  There is perspective here because you are aware that you are trapped by your fears.  Until that essential awareness has occurred you are totally in the dare and in bondage to your fears and you simply become the extension of your fear.  So you have already take the first step.  You have arrived at a point where you’re recognizing that your fears are limiting you.
The next step you have to take is to value your peace more than your fear.  Valuing your peace will cause you to do whatever you need to do to get in touch with your peace—again, whether that is taking a soak in a hot tub, or doing a meditation, or using a self-hypnosis relaxation technique.  As long as you value your peace more than the fear that is limiting you, and you reach for the experience of your peace, or lean into the experience of your peace through the methods I’ve mentioned, you will find yourself moving past the fear and arriving at a centered place. 
Now I will offer you and everyone else a suggestion, because very often in the process of relaxing and becoming centered you go to sleep because it is so relaxing.  If this happens to you hold an object in your hand that can easily slip out of your hand as you relax too much.  And in doing this you will find that when you get to the place where you’re going too far into your peace and your hand begins to relax, the slight movement of the object beginning to slip will be enough to bring you back without shocking you, just this side of the boundary line where you would go to sleep.  And you will learn how to ride on the edge of the deepest level of your peace for longer periods of time without losing it by falling asleep.  You will also find that the level or degree of centeredness you can attain will become deeper and deeper without you losing conscious awareness of your surroundings.
Now once you have connected with your peace, then from that peaceful place desire to be aware of what your appropriate behavior would be if you were not governed by your fear.  In other words, if you are dreadfully afraid of flying, you have no way to rationally consider a trip to the East Coast or to any place by plane from within the frame work of your fearful thought.  And so you cannot trust decisions that occur from that fearful place.  But if you will take the time to become quiet, to become centered, to be experiencing the peace of your being, where you’re not available to the fearful ego sense, and then you begin to consider what the significance of flying is, and how you might be able to do it and be calm.  You will find the information and the awareness’ that you need come into view.
There is another thing, by your regularly taking time to connect with the peace of your individuality, of your Being, the experience of that peace becomes more significantly registered in your memory.  As a result of that when you are confronted in your daily activity with something that tends to pull you off center, the memory of what it feels like to be centered is only perhaps 8 to 18 hours back in your experience.  And it becomes easier to remember on the spot what it felt like. 
And in remembering what it felt like it causes a spontaneous and natural movement of your focus of attention toward that centered place in you so that you rather quickly can have available to you a significantly greater sense of peace in your work day, so that you can deal from that peaceful perspective with the issue that ordinarily pulls you off center.  And your effectiveness will increase, and you will find yourself moving beyond the limit or the boundary that your fearful response would have kept you at.
The key to moving beyond your fear is a more significant experience of your peace.  You will not be able to do it by battling the fear.  You will not even be able to do it through intellectual arguments.  You will only be able to do it from a feeling.  And that feeling will have to be the feeling of your peace, and therefore your security.
Understand that when you are centered and experiencing your peace, you are not just experiencing and alternative emotion to fear or anger.  You are directly experiencing your nature.  It is therefore a far more significant experience than just not being tense.
When you meditate or when by any means you arrive at your center, you are directly experiencing your individuality and you are experiencing its immovable stability.  You are experiencing its eternality.  And it is only that which can inspire you to trespass against your ego sense and violate its ingrained limits. 
Becoming centered is even easier than getting in touch with your guide.  So we are not talking about something difficult here.  It boils down to making a decision as to which you value most, your experience of fear or your experience of peace.  Okay.
ANSWER:  Your goal to not harbor resentment as much as possible under the circumstances has been ennoble and ennobling.  Because whether you grasped it or not, it arouse out of a deep comprehension of what love really means.  And you valued it more than you valued your apparently justifiable anger.  I say apparently justifiable, because it was apparently justifiable from the ego standpoint.  And you need to know that you did well.
The only significance there was to the timing of your encounter with him was that you have arrived at a point where you can really feel the futility and uselessness of hate and anger and of blame.  And so, for you the encounter was significant. 
The threshold you are sensing yourself being on you would have been on even without the encounter, and your movement across the threshold would have occurred even without the encounter.  But the encounter has allowed you to release the barest shadow of justification within you that was being held in reserve for expressing distress and anger.  And that has freed you up so that you will be able to enjoy the crossing over the threshold a little bit more.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
QUESTION:  Paul, what is my Being trying to unfold to me at this time?  I feel like there’s so many endings, or feelings of things being finished up.  Am I on the leading edge of a change in another direction.  My method of receiving is nothing like you have explained, and I’ve never met anybody who receives like I do.  Is there any comment on these areas?
ANSWER:  Value whatever way your guidance is experienced.  Value whatever way your deepest levels of knowing emerge at the conscious level of your awareness.  That is number one.
I encourage you to be open to any developments that may occur in your receipt.  I am not going to suggest any particular thing to watch for, just value the way it works with you and be open to any enhancements that might occur. 
It is not so much of a matter of your moving in a new direction.  It is really the fact that loose end are unnatural to Being.  And you could say that you are moving into an experience of life in which there are no loose ends.  And so the clearing up of loose ends is not the finishing off of something so you can move on to something new with new loose ends.  It is simply a matter of your experience becoming more cohesive and integrated. 
That does not mean you will not do new things.  But do not conceptualize what is happening in a way that causes you to feel that one phase is coming to completion and a new phase is beginning.  It is like the same phase continuing in an essentially more normal way.  And I mean that in the sense of divinely normal.  Because it is divinely normal for there to be unfoldment, but it is not divinely normal of that unfoldment to be experienced in a ragged manner or with loose ends flopping around catching on things and impeding your progress.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
QUESTION:  I lived in California for many years before I moved to Oregon.  Even though I’ve been happy there, it’s a lovely state and all that, and I am happy there, but why do I still have the feeling of being misplaced?
ANSWER:  Because Oregon is not your state.  You do not blend with Oregon.  Fundamentally your energy is not at the same rate as the territory that constitutes the state of Oregon.  There is not a harmonizing with it.  As a result you seem to be riding the rails and unable to settle in and let go and relax.  It is not a bad place for you to be, it is not injurious or detrimental to you.  But the time will come when you will finally move back to California.
It is as though you are exploring other territory.  But I want you to know that it is not necessary for you to stay there and explore it overly long.  And it is not inappropriate for you to be open to and allowing of a shift back to California.  That’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  Don’t jump the gun, the cycle is not completed.  There is a period ahead of you of 8 or 9 months which will be relatively stable and eventless, let us say, a period in which to incorporate and integrate the learning from this cycle.  Do not become impatient to get on with the next step.  Give yourself time and space to breath.  Let yourself not be dealing with issues involving major growth.  Enjoy a little peace.  Give yourself the space and time to significantly make sense out of those steps which you have recently taken. 
In other words, in 8 or 9 months what you refer to this cycle will have come to an end.  In the meantime it may even seem a little dull, and that is the way it is supposed to be.  Okay, that’s the answer.
PAUL:  I’m going to ask a favor:  Could you say that question to be the first question tomorrow morning.  I need to say that I have arrived... I can’t say that I’ve arrived at a point of exhaustion because I haven’t.  But I’ve arrived at a point where I need to stop.  And I will never attempt to bluff my way through if I arrive at that point.  Tomorrow morning I would like to definitely start promptly at 9:30. 
In other words, I’d like to start earlier when I’m fresher so that... because I know I’ll have no trouble getting through until 5:30 in the afternoon tomorrow.  But right now I’ve run out of juice is what it feels like. 
ANSWER:  The first thing I want to assure you of is that your body is your ally.  It has a specific function to perform.  It has a reason for being.  It is not an illusion, although the distress you are referring to is not a part of its eternal identity.  The function of your body, its intent or reason for being is to render visible and tangible or identify the presence of your individuality.  Your individuality is the direct expression of the Life Principle.  And so, at the bottom line, it is your bodies purpose to identify the Life Principle.  And so its function or intent is absolutely divine. 
Your body is absolutely incapable of working at odds with you.  So then what is it that you are experiencing here that seems to be not harmonious, not pleasant, and which implies that your body can perhaps function in a way destructive to your well-being.  It is simply the manifestation of your blocking your perception of its divine intent. 
And you are blocking it by fear and grief.  There is a manifestation of your sorrow, your disappointment.  And the reason it is manifesting physically is because you are not allowing your sadness to find expression through tears.  At least you are not letting go of it fully.  You are attempting to be staunch, and strong, and have a rod up your backbone and move through this and not feel.  And yet you cannot eradicate your feelings.  And if you will go ahead and feel what you are feeling you will not be dragged down into the depths of misery.  You will find that in allowing it to come out it will be relatively brief.
Disappointment is the way we describe squelched hopes.  We think our hopes are squelched by circumstances outside of us, but we always do the squelching ourselves.  So when there is depression, when there is disappointment you may know that you are at that moment squelching your hope.  You squelch it with your negative feelings.
Now when you decide to let yourself feel your sadness, and you let it flow out, it flows out because something is pushing it out.  And what is pushing it out is the hope that lies eternally within you.  In the process of emerging it pushes out first the debris and garbage of negativity which you have been using to squelch it with.  And so that is why there are tears, that is why there is the feeling that you do not like. 
But in allowing it out, it is like allowing the cork on a champagne bottle to pop out.  There is pressure until the cork is out.  But once it is out, everything that is in the bottle of value, of delight can pour forth.  And so in letting these feelings be felt without squelching them, they will move rapidly out of the picture and what is pushing them out, what is cleansing you which is your hope and your confidence and your joy and your curiosity about life will come out.  And you will feel revitalized.  And the physical symptoms that you are experiencing will disappear because you are not stifling yourself.
Now this is the simple truth.  It might sound like psychology, but it works.  It is the intent of your being to fulfill itself perfectly and it has infinite capacities to do so.  And this is an eternal fact of your being.  Moment by moment you stand at the threshold of your fulfillment because your being is incapable of doing anything other than fulfilling itself.  That is the Movement which is called Life, conscious experience.
So there has been a change of dynamics, a change of arrangement of individualities in your life.  This in no way limits your essential being in its process of fulfilling itself because it still has infinite capacities and resources with which to fulfill itself. 
So you are not at a loss here.  What has happened is that life has not corresponded to your hope, to your particular concept of what you would have liked to have had. 
Again, I want to assure you that you will not be swallowed up and smothered by your sadness.  It will not incapacitate you for weeks or months on end, unless you squelch it and do not allow yourself to feel it.  Then you will debilitate yourself, and incapacitate yourself to some extent for a much longer period of time. 
The relationship is over, yes.  Do not hang on to it.  Don’t maintain yourself in readiness for a reversal of the situation.  In effect that would be like Lot’s wife looking back.  You need to dare to allow your attention to be on the present with a totally fresh open sense, and an eagerness to see the fulfillment which your being is unfolding at this moment, fulfillment that will be identifiable to you as fulfillment.  Be willing to let go and understand that the separating of your ways has not succeeded and cannot succeed at depriving you in any way from your ongoing fulfillment. 
If you want to be angry about it, you may know that you are more interested in justice than you are in your fulfillment.  And that is okay, but getting justice is not satisfying.  And being attentive to the fulfillment that is yours is satisfying, because it aligns you with your capacity to experience your fulfillment. 
Let there be a significant releasing of the past now.  Let yourself feel whatever sadness or grief is there, but do it with the understanding that in allowing it out it will pass off and that there will be a movement to the surface of your awareness of your essential hope and vitality and love and aliveness.  And once again, a clear sense of the worthwhileness of being alive. 
Let that picture of the champagne bottle be a valuable image for you.  The grief is just the cork with which you are squelching your vital hope and strong sense of life.  And you must let the cork go so that the bubbly in your life can come out.  Okay.
ANSWER:  What she said was nonsense.  I cannot explain it to you.  It did have value in that it gave you something to hold on to, a sense of continuity and meaning.  And that was its value.  You see there is nothing you work with him on.  He is on about his business.  He does not need any help.  He is not trapped or somehow held back from his own development.  And the real necessity here is for you not to be held back in terms of your own development and growth and your discovery of the fulfillment which your being is also unfolding in the now, and unfolding in terms that have meaningful value for you. 
It is important for you not to remain attached to your memories.  That does not mean that you should not have memories, or that you should try to get rid of them, but you should not energize a sense of togetherness, or a sense of unity of intent with someone who is not with you and who is not working with you with a common intent.  You should not be preoccupied with the past because it keeps you from being present and available to the fulfillment that is happening in the now.
I would suggest to you that you give the necklace away.  This has two purposes.  One is that it acts out your release of him and your release of the relationship, thereby releasing you from your past.  The other thing it does is to free your desire for fulfillment and meaning to free that desire up and because you are not supplying a focus for it in the past it forces it to move in the direction of your future. 
The relationship must be released.  It is not a fact now.  If it is not released, if it is held on to you will become over the years a very dull and sad woman.  It will promote senility.  I am not trying to frighten you, but I am trying to convey to you the impracticality of holding on to the past, holding on to that which is not actively existent now. 
You are a divine entity.  You are the presence of consciousness, the conscious experience of being—the conscious experience of being it is the Creation of God, the infinite Mind or intelligence.  Because of this, what you are, as the conscious experience of being is itself the threshold of life, the threshold of fulfillment.  You are not here to sacrifice what you are for a relationship, whether it is a current relationship or one that was in your past. 
That is really the lesson that all of you are having to learn, because all of you have to one degree or another sacrificed yourself for something else, or someone else.  And that sacrifice has constituted a self-depreciation, a devaluing of oneself.  You see, if you are the very threshold of life, of creation, if you are that place where creation flows into conscious experience, into manifestation, then it behooves you to give your attention to the now, the place where you are experiencing being conscious, because that is where your fulfillment lies.
It is time for you to move forward now by allowing yourself to be in the present and release the past.  Literally, the cork is out of your bottle.  When we spoke last August the cork was not yet out, and there was, let us say, some grief work to do.  But you have done it and the cork is gone.  And you need to give your energy in a vital way to the now that you are in because the bubbly is coming out. 
To give away the necklace will constitute an acknowledgment on your part that you are willing to experience the bubbly, which your being is unfolding now.  An acknowledgment of your freedom to look forward and to be open to fulfillment now. 
Your husband is not bound in any way to you.  He has not forgotten you.  His love has not changed, but he is on about his business with great joy.  And it is your right and your opportunity to move on with your life with delight and joy, without devaluing in any way what you had in that relationship. 
PAUL:  And this is me.  The picture I’m getting is like—I don’t know that you might have had a red, white and blue dress—but the image that I’m getting is of a, let’s say, a eleven or twelve year old who had a dress that was red, white and blue.  And it was a dress that absolutely delighted this child.  I mean it was one that the child really related to.  It was pure pleasure.  And yet the child was growing and it got to the point where she was too big for the dress, even though the dress wasn’t worn out.  And there was a time to stop taking it off the hanger and trying to get it on.  And then there came a time when it actually had to be taken out of the closet and given away to someone else, released from possession to make room for something new.
The sense of the image is that to take it out of the closet and no longer possess it, to give it away didn’t devalue the meaning it had and the delight that was experienced and all of the enjoyment that was gotten from wearing it, and even seeing it in the closet.  None of that enjoyment, none of the texture and the value that it added to this little girls overall life.  None of that was undermined in any way.  But there came a time when it had to be released to make room for new fulfillment that was more appropriate, that fit the growing person.
And it’s like it is now time for you to dare to look at the garments of life that fit the new you, the growing you.  And overall the strong sense that whole thing is a positive process that you’re going through.  Okay.
ANSWER:  Just insist on the forward look.  As I have been saying, it is the movement of your being that constitutes creation.  Because the movement of your being is the presence of the Life Principle in the process of fulfilling itself.  And by allowing yourself to be consciously centered, on the threshold of now, of the instant of conscious awareness that you are experiencing you have aligned yourself with reality and it’s direct perception.  Preoccupation with the past or dread of the future keeps your attention out of the now where the fulfillment is occurring.
You are doing quite well at staying in the now with an expectant sense of observing the fulfillment which your being is manifesting, creating.  And this is why you are happier.  It feels good not to be conflicted within yourself.  It feels good to be on target.  That’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  The throat area is the area where you feel most vulnerable physically.  And it is the place that you tend to tense up in order to provide a feeling of enough density to be invulnerable.  It is like you armor yourself there, or shield yourself there.  Now it happens that generally speaking around your globe the sixth chakra is opening.  This is a part of the shift of consciousness, part of the development.  And in light of that point of development your tendency to protect yourself in this area is becoming significantly more oppositional to the opening process.  And so, the distress is becoming more pronounced.
PAUL:  Okay, this is me.  There is a book that he’s recommending that you obtain, and it’s called “Energy Ecstas.”  The author is Bernard Gunther.  The book has to do with learning how—either by yourself or with a partner—how to clear the chakras.  Are you familiar with the term chakras?  Okay. 
One of the reasons I think this book is of special value is because it helps one learn how to clear his own chakras or her own chakras alone so that you’re not at a loss if you can tell things are out of kilter you’re not at a loss because you can’t find anybody to help clear your chakras.  And the sense is to use the technique that is shown for clearing the throat chakra, so that you can maybe once a day take time to sit down, take some quiet time to clear the blocks in there so that you become more in harmony with the general opening of the sixth chakra which everyone is in one way or another experiencing. 
It’s like you have a habit that’s pulling in one direction and when nothing was happening with the chakra it was just as intense as it was.  But not that there’s an opening up it’s like there’s a pulling against your tendency to shield yourself and it’s creating more intensity.  And you need to begin to relax so that you’re moving in the same direction that your being is unfolding in.  I hope that made sense.  Okay.
Okay, I have to put this in my own words too.  The fear around letting go arises out of the feeling that if you really let go you will be especially vulnerable.  But if you understand that the unblocking of the sixth chakra constitutes a clearer experience of the integrity of your self-expression, a clearer experience of the cohesiveness of your expressing yourself it will be more reasonable to you to conceive of going ahead and relaxing and letting go of the control in that area.  Okay.  That is the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  There is a possibility it is not something that you should offhandedly turn off in your mind as a possibility.  It is not likely to happen before the next 18 months is up.  And there should not be any impatience around that because both of you are taking necessary steps, essential steps, which will pave the way for the move in 18 months. 
At the present time there is a 50-50 split between you’re moving to the Bay area and the Carmel area.  Which means that you can afford to be open to either place and not just home in on the Bay area.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
PAUL:  And this is me.  There’s a sense that moving here would require like a major shift for you Janet, like a major shift of intent or focus.  And there’s nothing wrong with that.  I mean it isn’t like that’s not a good thing.  The sense of it is certainly be open to that kind of a possibility of there being a major shift of focus for you.  Okay, that’s all there was.
PAUL:  Okay, the question was that he would like an energy reading, specifically around the development of his sixth chakra.
PAUL:  Okay, I’m going to have to put this in my own words.  The image I’m getting is a flower, like a tulip, sort of the shape of a flower as opposed to a rose.  In other words, the petals form like a cup.  And it’s like the flower represents the throat chakra and it’s opening.  Except it’s like the ends of the petal are fluttering or quivering like trying to close up again.  It’s like, “Oh, don’t open too fast, don’t open too fast, don’t open too fast.”  Because there’s a feeling like if your point of awareness were down in the center of the flower it’s like what you’re feeling that once it opens up you’ll be sucked out through the opening.  And it’s like you’ll be out of control if you let go and get sucked out.
ANSWER:  But that is the point of the opening of the sixth chakra so that there is an uninhibited and uncontrolled flow or expression of essential self that does—this is Raj—that does not mean just verbal expression of self, it means the trusting ability to act in the world from your center. 
It is one thing to become aware of all that you essentially are at an intellectual level and marvel at your wonderousness, but there comes a point at which you must dare to be that wondrousness, own it so that it is allowed into expression. 
It is a wonderful thing to learn that you are the light of the world—everyone—it is another thing to go ahead and be that light.  Because in order to be it there has to be a great amount of self-appreciation.  And everyone is conditioned to self-depreciation.  The ego has done it.  Your religions have done it.  Your parents have done it.  You have in one way or another been programmed into your unworthiness and the great need to behave in a way to earn your worth, to earn the right to feel good about yourself, to appreciate yourself enough to dare to express yourself from your heart, to express yourself with honesty.
That is what is happening here with the opening of the sixth chakra.  You see it is the ego which wants control.  It wants to know ahead of time what is going to happen so that it can be in charge and be prepared for any response that might follow one’s self-expression.  As a result of that interference of the flow of your essential self everything gets messed up.  
So when you find yourself having the feeling that if you get opened up any more that you will be sucked through the opening and be out of control you can, at least intellectually, begin to understand that that is the whole point.  And that indeed in letting go of the artificial need for control you are further putting yourself in the position of experiencing the underlying unity, cohesiveness and harmony of life.
It is scary to be out of control because you believe that there is essential chaos in the universe, and that it is only through the exercise of control that that chaos can be held down to a dull roar.  As a result, you have to deny yourself, you have to cover up your essential value, and you have to suffer the absence of self-appreciation.
Your flower is open about 35 percent, or let us say the sixth chakra.  You are not resisting it greatly.  But I want to communicate to you that what you are defending yourself against is your great joy.  You are defending yourself against your invulnerability.  You are defending yourself against your immovable eternal stability. 
The more you defend it the more you will find yourself having physical difficulties—and I am addressing everyone here—in the throat area.  Even the neck area in the back in terms of tension and headaches. 
The Christ Consciousness that each one of you fundamentally is, is going to emerge.  Because mankind is waking up.  And even though each one of you is having a tug-of-war, where part of you is desiring your Awakening, and part of you is resisting it, the fact is that the Awakening process is winning.  And it is winning because there is a very great number of individualities who are already totally Awakened.  And as a result the general consciousness of the Brotherhood of Man is less dense.  And so it is easier to spontaneously experience one’s enlightenment.
There is not as much ego structure or strength in the entire Brotherhood and as a result each one’s ego structure is weaker.  And each embracing of your further integrity, or experience of integrity, each willingness to own your divinity, each allowance of greater self-appreciation lessens the density further and, as I said yesterday, compounds the growth.  Things will be moving quite rapidly, and the ego will be frightened, but your Soul will be so happy.
You may loose control as you go through the opening, but there will be a simultaneous and corresponding awareness of your invulnerability and integrity, and so you will not find yourself overwhelmed or terribly frightened.  The fear is not from what is happening, it is not from the opening, it is from the projections which the ego is making upon the event of opening.  You can trust into the essential integrity of your Being which is emerging at the conscious level of your awareness.  No one else can do that for you.  No one else can invest that trust and risk the chance, because from the ego standpoint it certainly is a risk.
And so that is why I am encouraging you, that is why your guide is encouraging you.  And that is why you find encouragement available and present from other unusual sources.  Because it is hard to have the nerve to invest the trust and risk the chance without help from a different perspective.  That’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  I cannot answer that, simply because there are too many variables.  It will depend entirely on how willing you are to allow the opening to occur, how willing you are to embrace whatever that opening might mean.  That’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  It most certainly was.  Except understand that it was your ego sense that was battling against your willingness to function in areas over which your ego had no control.  And so it was fighting to get your attention back into its little play ground.  It is important for you to understand that it is a waste of time for you to attempt to battle the ego, because it is a highly skilled defense mechanism.  It knows with great skill how to defend itself successfully.
The way you disengage yourself from it is not to confront it directly, but literally to desire yourself right past it, you might say, into your greater capacity to be aware, into your divine knowing by desiring to Know, with a capital “K”, you can move past the ego defenses, and it cannot do anything about it because you are not giving your energy to it.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  Let us say that you are not significantly blocking anything.  And let me also say that there is always infinite opportunity for putting into expression the flow of your essential Being, of your essential energy.  I encourage you not to be heavy duty about this.  Let there be a lightness, a sense of delight.  Be alert for expressions of beauty, whether it is dusty and polishing your dining room table or clipping the rose bushes, or arranging flowers, or getting dressed.  Let there be a real lightness, so that each thing does not become a task or a test or a significant part of your forward movement.
You cannot work your way into the Kingdom of Heaven, you have to allow yourself into the Kingdom of Heaven.  The process becomes less and less work, less and less stress and strain, less and less labor, more and more peace, more and more joy, with less effort needing to be expended in order to deserve the joy.
PAUL:  This is me.  The image I am getting is like at the doorway to the Kingdom of Heaven there is not a little booth like at a theater where you go up and pay for your ticket for admission.  There isn’t a cost to get into the Kingdom of Heaven.  It’s your Birthright.  It’s where you belong.  It’s your Home. 
He says...
ANSWER:  So don’t do everything with the sense that in some way you are paying your dues.  In this way you will not be quite so serious about it, heavy about it. 
The only thing that I will say, the only direction that I will give is to let your attention be given to delighting and expressing beauty for you to enjoy.  Not for anyone else.  If someone else enjoys it that is because they have allowed themselves to enjoy it and says something about them, not about you. 
If you like to see reflections of color, and outline, and light in the surface of a beautiful piece wood, then polish it and take the time to notice it as you walk past it.  Don’t overlook it in your hurry to get on to the next thing.  Don’t overlook it in your concern about what others will think about it.  It’s all for you.  You are not to miss out on any of the delight of life or Heaven.
So do what you do with a light touch and a light attitude.  Okay.
ANSWER:  That is not an appropriate issue to deal with at this time.  The reason being, that you need to allow yourself to incorporate and really embrace in an accepting way the idea of moving, really moving.  Not just thinking about it, arriving at a point in yourself of a decision that if the way unfolds you will flow with it. 
In effect, by attending to this first step of integrating the decision you set things into motion, it causes the necessary energies to gather and take on the form that will be the manifestation of the place to move to, the work to do, the way to do it, the school for your daughter to attend, etc.  Do not be impatient, else in effect you will jumble or not provide the essential focus or intent that will begin to bring the energies into a new pattern of manifestation for you.
Understand, as I said earlier, that it is the intent of your Being to fulfill itself perfectly.  It is also the intent of your daughters Being to fulfill itself perfectly.  And with both of you it has infinite resources with which to do so.  What is essential is for you to have the fundamental desire, and to have arrived at a point within yourself where there is a willingness to make a commitment to the fulfillment of that desire.  And then abide with the desire, and don’t get out there and try to manipulate your world into the fulfillment of it.
The power of the movement of fulfillment lies in your desire.  Not in your thinking and not in your doing.  And a willingness to commit to the fulfillment of that desire as the movement of the desire itself brings about the form that identifies the fulfillment.
Trust that your Being has infinite wisdom and sees the whole picture without anything being left out.  And therefore, its unfoldment of that which identifies fulfillment will be flawless.  And then simply be attentive, listen.  Not coercively, not impatiently, but allowingly listen, and you will find yourself knowing what the next step is.  And you will find the opportunity for employment unfolding itself and practically walking up to you and hitting you in the face before you recognize it.
And so I encourage you not to be too busy trying to figure out how this is all going to work out, because in your busyness you are likely to overlook, or not immediately see the very fulfillment which your being is unfolding.  So be patient for right now.  And just feel the desire to move.  It is consistent with what your being is unfolding, and it is consistent with the best interest of your daughter.  Okay.
ANSWER:  To the contrary, you could say it is expanding your growth.  You are not attending to nonessentials, they have to be taken care of, and they fall to you to take care of.  What will help you most significantly is to not resist them in any way as though they are depriving you of your self-expression.  You will not be dealing with these things indefinitely.  And they are providing you with the opportunity to become aware of an increased capacity, an increased ability.  It has served to reveal to you greater depth and breathe.  It also kept you from a very significant depression or slump which you would have been inclined to go into.  You didn’t have time.  Thank God.
To whatever degree you feel like these demands are somehow not valid for you and are interfering with your essential growth and development and joy, you will find your energy depleted because you will bring resistance and frustration and anger into play, and energy will go right out the window to maintain those feelings.  Do not resent the necessities that you are confronted with having to deal with.  You are coming out of the woods, so to speak, in terms of time and effort that is needing to be expended in these directions.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
PAUL:  Okay, the words I’m getting is that it is appropriate for you to open the door to your work room.  Does that make sense?  Okay.  And also the image that I’m getting in terms of an overview are like of a calendar is that by September, it’s like go ahead and open the door and maybe start cleaning up so that you’re not opening the door for the first time in September and having to clean everything up.  It’s like by September you’re going to have quite a bit of time to play.  But you can go ahead and open the door to your work room and begin to be aware of what you’d like to do and getting things arranged and set up.


ANSWER:  The most appropriate thing to do would be to have healing sessions.  There is no need to go into or try to find out what the cause of the problem is.  I would like to encourage you to also avail yourself of the help of your own healing team.

PAUL:  Okay, this is me.  He wants me to share this with you.  He has explained that not only does each one of us have a spiritual guide, a specific individuality who is present for us on behalf of our growth and Awakening.  But there’s also a group of individualities who work like under the jurisdiction of or in conjunction with  (end of tape 6).

address a question or a desire or whatever to your guide, your guide will hear you.  So even if you haven’t established dialog with your guide you can ask your guide for a healing session at a particular time or “will my healing team, or a group be with me while I’m driving all night long,” or whatever the need is.  And Raj has indicated that you can count on it that if you ask your guide will follow through, even though you may not later be able to say, “Okay, what did they do?  And how are things?  And is there anything left to do,” and so on.  So be aware that you have that kind of help available to you. 
I think that’s helpful to know, because if something comes up that you need help on and you call me to have Raj set up a healing session and the line is busy, you don’t have to feel at a loss you can say, “Wait a minute,” and just ask your guide, just mentally express the desire to your guide to have a healing session with your healing team, right away.
PAUL:  I’m going to put this in my own words, because it was sort of just all there in a flash.  It is like yes, there is something you can do.  And that is take one of those little yellow stickum things that you can write messages on, and write the word relax on it.   And stick it on your typewriter or computer screen or whatever’s in front of you, in some place where you’ll see it often.  And when you see it just take a moment to let go of your shoulders. 
It’s like just sort of consciously go all the way down and relax your shoulders, your arms.  You can even sit there for a second with your arms at your side, and just consciously let go.  And you’ll find out that as you’ve been working you’ve slowly raised your shoulders up and you’re holding them there, and you slowly tensed up.  And so if 10 or 12 times a day you’ll just stop for just a second and let go.  Then what will happen is as the days go by, you’ll begin to notice when you start to raise it up, and you’ll catch yourself sooner and you’ll say, “oops, no.”  And you’ll recondition yourself. 
But it definitely is tension.  And it’s from not having been taught that if you’re working at a desk and in the same position for many hours that you need to learn how to do it and stay relaxed, because you won’t tend naturally to stay relaxed.  So that’s the answer there.
ANSWER:  Tell her to stop trying so hard.  You see, all that is necessary is for her to have come to a point of decision regarding desiring to have a child.
PAUL:  She’s married?  Okay, because the sense was really that both of them, she and her husband having come to a point where that’s what they want.
ANSWER:  You see, it is not understood clearly that the essential element is the desire.  And that the desire includes within itself the energy necessary for its fulfillment, the means for its fulfillment.  So having come to the point of desiring it and having decided for flowing with that unfoldment, they really need to relax and just enjoy each other when they are together intimately, and allow the desire to fulfill itself. 
There is a great deal of tension.  They are not really able to be attentive to each other, because there is a sense of needing to accomplish, wanting to accomplish.  And brings a level of distress that makes conception difficult.  They need to allow conception to occur.  And they need to realize that it is out of there hands, they’re taking on a false sense of responsibility.  And they need to simply enjoy the sharing and the being sensitive to each other, and the fullness of the time spent together intimately.  They need to relax and enjoy themselves.  The rest will follow quite naturally because the desire is there and the decision in favor of the fulfillment of that desire is there, they have done the essential things.
PAUL:  This is me.  The sense I’m getting is that her husband will be greatly relieved to hear this.  Okay.
ANSWER:  Because the ego is a defense mechanism it requires a state of conflict in which to function.  In the midst of peace there is nothing to defend itself against, and it loses its definition, and I am meaning that even in the sense of structural definition.  It dissolves, it falls apart, it cannot hold itself together in the presence of peace.  And this is an extremely important point to understand.  This is why it has been said that you will find your power in your peace. 
Therefore, you can learn to recognize the activity of the ego whenever you find yourself feeling conflicted, whenever you find polarization within yourself, whenever there is an obvious presence of duality.  Polarization is always felt as a level of uneasiness.  And it will always be accompanied with a physical sensation of uneasiness in the area of the solar plexus. 
When you are centered and you are experiencing insight, you are receiving guidance, even if the answers or the guidance are not what you had expected, or not what you thought you wanted to hear, you will nevertheless find the area around your solar plexus at peace.  It is absolutely impossible for the ego to artificially create a relaxed solar plexus, and thus fool you into believe that the guidance is coming from a reliable source, meaning the level of your capital “B” Being.
So the sensation in the area of the solar plexus is one of the ways in which you can know that the ego is functioning and that you are hooked to some degree.  Any time there is physical discomfort, any time there is mental distress or emotional distress you may know that the ego is functioning.  And like I said earlier, the only means of moving out of the ego’s territory is to desire on your part to connect with the peace of your Being.  It is to sidestep the ego.  If things are really stressful, meditation is the most direct route you can take to your center.
Besides creating a sense of distress in you, the ego also blocks your experience of freedom by suggesting to you that it is unreasonable for you to expect as much as you are expecting.  It causes you to feel one way or another as though you don’t deserve it, and then sets you to work at earning it.
Whenever you find yourself inclined to say, “no, I can’t do that,” or, “no, I’d better not do that,” or, “if I were younger I wouldn’t think twice about it, but now,” etc., that is just conditioning, that is just your ego speaking.  It says that when you were a certain age you most certainly were standing at the threshold of fulfillment, but now you’re less deserving of it or less capable of experiencing it, and therefore it is not available to you as readily.  And the amazing thing is that you believe it. 
As I said yesterday, you are always standing at the leading edge of your unfoldment.  There is no way for you to stand five feet back from the leading edge actually.  That’s the end of the answer.
PAUL:  The sense is that those are the most significant ploys that the ego uses to bind you.
ANSWER:  I want you to be extremely grateful for the insulin.  Do not resent it.  Do not resent needing it.  Its presence is the provision of love.  It is love appearing in language that meets the need at the moment and identifies the ongoingness of your Being.  That’s step one.
Step two:  Your peace is not a physical thing.  It isn’t governed by your physique.  And your experience of it is available to you at any time that you want to experience it.  It is the peace of your Being, not just an emotional equilibrium.  It is the substance of your Being.  And if you are drawing a breath, and if you are capable of having an experience of taking insulin then your Being is present, and your Being is available to you to experience.
When you become centered you are not moving into a quiet place some place in your body, you are not moving into a quiet physical place, you are moving into your essential individuality.  And your essential individuality is there to move into, no matter what your blood sugar level is doing. 
It is impossible for God to be at the mercy of His infinite manifestation, else the manifestation would be God.  It is impossible for God’s direct expression, meaning your individuality, to be subject to that which identifies it.  And this needs to be very clear to you, because you have bought into the idea that your peace is and can be blocked by your body, by its blood sugar level, by its activity or inactivity.  And thus you have blocked yourself by virtue of that belief from experiencing the peace of your Being that is inviolably yours to be experiencing.
Your peace is available to you to experience.  You need to know that fact and then allow yourself into it through meditation or whatever works fairly efficiently to help you to relax.  In connecting with it you will find your body beginning to, we’ll say respond and come into better alignment, manifest more stability and peace.  And the up and down swings will not be as great.
There has been an assumption that because of the presence of conflict you have been and can be somehow blocked from, or successfully blocked from your peace.  But you see that is an idea that has gone across your mind that you have bought into.  And this is the way the ego works.  Because it causes you to forget that you truly do have another vantage point available to you than the ego’s vantage point, so that it doesn’t occur to you to access it, or it occurs to you to access it, but then you believe you can’t because the situation is such that it’s impossible. 
This is not true.  Your peace is constantly available to you because you are that peace, your individuality is the presence of that peace.  And the only way your peace could not be present or not be available to you is if you were not present, if you did not exist.  And that also is an impossibility. 
I want you to consciously and conscientiously challenge and invalidate the suggestion that because of the swings of the sugar level in your body, you really can’t connect with the peace of your Being.
PAUL:  Okay, this is me.  Literally, what I was getting is that when those kinds of thoughts cross your mind say if you can have a one word response like, “ridiculous!”  Or the word I was really getting which I do have trouble saying is, “bullshit!”
Whatever effectively dismisses as absolutely ridiculous the idea.  So when the idea comes that there isn’t any way to connect with your peace, it’s like, “bullshit!”  Okay?
ANSWER:  You certainly are.  That is why it seems to be as difficult as it does.  I mean that in the sense that the practice of unconditional love takes guts.  It doesn’t feel natural.  It goes against the grain of your conditioned thinking.  It requires not being in charge or in control.  It requires yielding to the underlying orderliness of Being.  And no one really has much practice at allowing.  This is what you are doing a lot of.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  The likelihood is low.  Only because the reality of things is that you have other areas in which there is a preference to let your energy flow.  I mean by that, an area other than a significant relationship.  And that is in order.  You are attending to things that need to be attended to.  And you are on target or on track, you are flowing with the unfolding of your being. 
It is not likely to happen within the next year, because you are not ready for it to happen.  And I mean YOU are not ready.  You are not likely to have opened the door and said, “I am ready to have company, I am ready to share myself with you.”  And this is excellent.  And I would encourage you not to open the door until you are ready, and you will know when you are.  Honor where you are presently.  And as your feeling changes, honor that change and flow with it.
It is more likely to be 18 to 24 months before you will desire, truly desire to have a relationship.  And of course, the moment the desire is there the wheels will be set into motion and the fulfillment will take form. 
The key thing I am trying to impress upon you here is to respect and honor where you are coming from at the moment, and not assume for any intellectual reasons that you ought to be doing something different.  You have more than a reasonable...
PAUL:  Okay, the specific words won’t come, but the meaning is that you can reasonably, or even more than reasonably expect the relationship that will develop to be a significant one and a long lasting one.  And it’s also like you are far from the frazzled little girl that you were when in your prior relationship (the only reason I’m hesitating is because I never heard you talk about a prior relationship, but I mean it sounds like a marriage) I mean it’s like at that point you were quite immature and sort of frazzled and there’s been a lot of change.  And what will unfold will tend to be quite stable and meaningful.  Okay.
ANSWER:  No.  The name is serving as a stepping stone to accessing some piece of information from that period in your life which will be forth coming.  It will not even seem like a particularly significant piece of information, and yet it will have somewhat profound effects on you in the now, releasing effect.  Not a releasing from something traumatic, but a subtle set of belief structures that are limiting you somewhat in the present.  It is like sweeping out a little bit of dust that was swept under the corner of the rug.  It is not enough to get excited about, but it is a little bit of spring cleaning.  Let it unfold and do not fret over what it is.  Okay.
PAUL:  You want to come to Carmel too, huh? 
Okay, I’m putting this in my own words.  He’s indicating yes that the tightness in the neck was because that’s where you clapped down or grounded yourself. 
ANSWER:  You are bringing into your life now those dynamics, those relationships and those opportunities which will facilitate your development and your forward movement in terms of “career activity.”  And you are recognizing that although they are not tending to move you in the direction of traditional business activity, they are moving you in the direction of, let us say, a life work.
What it is essential for you to understand is that you are already experiencing the process of your Being unfolding its fulfillment.  You are already experiencing the ultimate.  So do not see this “ultimate” as something to come off in the future somewhere. 
These dynamics are not responsible for your growth, your growth is responsible for the dynamics.  They are the forms which your consistent desire has created.  And so you are having evidence of the fact that your world supports you.  Your world is here to serve you by identifying your fulfillment, your wholeness.  Your world is not here to create your wholeness.  There is a oneness between you and your world.  And what you experience in your world is a mirror of either the clarity or the confusion of your awareness of your integrity, of your capital “S” Self, of your divine Being. 
You must keep this in mind else you will give your power away, you will overlook the fact that you are confronted with the manifestation of your already perfectly functioning capital “B” Being.  And you will see yourself as short-changed, as limited, as incomplete, and you will see these benefits as your saviors, and you will empower them in an indirect way. 
You see, the presence of these dynamics were empowered by your Being in the first place as that which would identify the fulfillment of your Being.  And that is why they are in your experience.  And when you do not realize that, when you do not realize that your Being has already empowered the forms, you will see them as occurring independent of you and you will recognize their positive presence in your life, and you will empower them through space. 
But that empowering of them will only substantiate your sense of incompleteness and will not connect you with the experience of the total integrity of your Being, which their presence is already identifying.  And so you will continue to feel disintegrated.
So appreciate John and Janet, and appreciate me, and appreciate Paul, and appreciate the members of the group and everyone who is apparently helping confirm for you things that you found yourself already knowing at some level.  But understand that it is your Being which has unfolded all of these dynamics in the way that they have unfolded for you as evidence of your already existing integrity. 
I am not going to suggest to you what particular form of activity you might be engaged in, because when you get to this point of unfoldment the form that your activity will take must arise out of love in you.  And so it is only appropriate for me to encourage you to be in touch with what is important to you, what you love, and let it unfold to you the form in which it is intent upon moving into expression.  And then be true to it, be faithful to it.  That is what constitutes your inner integrity, your devotion to your Being and what it is unfolding.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
PAUL:  May I make a comment here?  Because I was sort of aware of it in the answer that he was giving to you.  It’s like it may look to you like you have come here to get something from Raj.  Like Ray might be the key figure, or the focal point.  But if you notice Raj doesn’t have an agenda for any of you.  So what has transpired, and what transpires on any weekend, is whatever has arisen out of your desire to know, so each one of us, all of us who are asking questions are equal participants, we’re equally responsible for what happens in the weekend.
And it’s important to know that if you are getting answers that are being helpful, it’s because from somewhere in you you have evolved the opportunity for the weekend to occur.  So every single one of us is equally responsible for the weekend and plays an equal part, and who happens to be asking the questions or answering the questions is just incidental to the process of Awakening which is really the event. 
And I think it’s important to realize that.  Otherwise we get things out of perspective and we’re sort of looking up to something that we assume is far greater than us, and that’s a put down on us.  Each one of you evolved this weekend.  Okay.
PAUL:  Lots!  He agrees. 
ANSWER:  I want to change the emphasis of your question though.  You said, “is there anything I need to know and I said, “lots.”  What I really want to convey to you is that there is an abundance, a tremendous abundance of good news, a tremendous abundance of new insights, a tremendous abundance of new clarity, and a tremendous abundance of the experience of the integrity and cohesiveness and indivisible oneness of you and your whole conscious experience of body, world, universe. 
It is like a treasure sits in front of you to discern.  Not one you have to created, not one you have to dig for, it is what is confronting you all the time.  Because the Reality of Being has never gone anywhere, it never disappeared, it was never destroyed and so it does not need to be recreated, or even brought out of the vault because it was never hidden. 
I want to encourage all of you to have a sense of marvelous curiosity and inquisitiveness and interest in discovering the Heaven that you are in.  And I do not mean the Heaven you are in as opposed to the Heaven others are in.  I mean the Reality, with a capital “R”, which is the perfect, undistorted, unchanged, ever present manifestation of God. 
And I also want to encourage each of you to dare to look at yourselves as the unchanged and actual unchangeable perfect expression of God.  I want to encourage you to realize that you do not have to go through great processes of earning your stripes of divinity.  You are divine.  You cannot stop being divine.  And only someone who is ignorant of what he is could be fooled into earning his stripes. 
The ego indulges in hazing.  And to tell you that you need to earn your stripes is like telling the first year student in junior high school that he is supposed to go over right away to the swimming pool and see the coach when there isn’t any swimming pool there.  You are being encourage by the ego to indulge in a useless effort. 
The ego creates conflict within you and then tells you that you are demoralized and says you must find out what this is that is upsetting you so that you may find your peace.  And it sends you on a witch hunt, which is very often called psychotherapy.  And it sends you through a maze of tunnels through your ego, but it can never get you out of the territory of the ego.  Because it will never direct you to the cause of the distress or demoralization, which is the ego itself. 
Psychotherapy at this point will not help you become released from the ego, it sees the ego as essential.  And the most that it can do is to help you arrive at some sort of agreement or truce with your ego so that you have a reasonable degree of equilibrium, but not really peace.
What I want to emphasize here for you is not to make hard work out of emerging into clarity.  If you get up in the morning and your drapes are closed and the interior of the house is dark it is not necessary for you to get down on your knees and bow 36 times to the east, and 12 times to the west and say certain words and then clean up the kitchen and make the bed and 25 other things before it is possible for you to experience the light.  You can walk directly to the front door and open it and step out into it and there it is.  But the conditioning of the ego tells you that you cannot do it that simply.  But I am telling you that you can. 
There is nothing that will stop you if you have made a decision for it, from stepping into the light.  There is nothing that can stop you from stepping out of your past no matter how dark it has seemed to be, without any process to it.  In other words, there is nothing that can stop you from dropping off your unnecessary burdens because you choose to, and experience the absence of burden or the freedom of burden. 
You do not have to dig out every single little dirty detail.  You do not have to handle every single little bit of garbage you have accumulated on the way and put into your knapsack, to relieve yourself of the knapsack.  You do not have to deserve your freedom, your joy, it is your birthright.  You do not have to earn it.  You do have to want it.  And then you have to allow it in. 
And so what you need to know is don’t make life so hard for yourself.  If you want to be in the sun walk into the sun—light.  If you want a drink of water, get a drink of water.  Don’t ask yourself if you have earned the right to walk into the kitchen and turn on the faucet. 
And let the process of waking up be a little bit more pleasurable.  As I said earlier, do it with a light heart.  I also want to let you know that karma is a crock.  It is a means the ego has of justifying the existence of trial and tribulation and conflict in your experience so that you will not challenge it.  And you need to challenge it, and you need to feel right at challenging it.  And when the thought comes, “boy, I must have really done something bad to have these experiences that I’m confronted with,” catch yourself and de-energize or disqualify the suggestion. 
The only thing you can possibly suffer from is a current ignorance.  There is no way to suffer today for an ignorance you had 5000 years ago, or even 5 years ago.  If you are suffering in any way today you are suffering from the bondage of a belief structure that is also present in the moment that you are suffering.  And if you don’t like to suffer in the same way that you don’t like to be in a dark house, then don’t mess around with the suffering or the dark house, open the door and walk into the light. 
I am wanting to emphasize here, that to move into the light is a result of two things:  A desire to and a commitment to the fulfillment of that desire.  You do not have to go through obedience’s or 500 hail Mary’s in order to arrive at your good.  You deserve it because you are conscious.  And if you are conscious, then you are the presence of the infinite intelligence in specific manifestation. 
And if as a result of divinely being what you are as consciousness, you have the capacity to imagine and imaginatively create a set of concepts which do not conform to Reality.  And just because you can believe what you have thought does not mean that you can possibly actually become anything less than what you were divinely created to be.  And so what you divinely are is accessible to you at any moment you make the decision for it—and commit to its fulfillment.
It is easy to get into the Kingdom of Heaven, or the undistorted conscious experience of Being, which constitutes pure joy.  And that is why encourage you to approach today and tomorrow with a light heart.  And with no sense of having to labor for any reason, karmic or otherwise, religious or otherwise, to manage somehow to get the god’s to open the door for you so that poor little you can finally emerge into the wondrous light. 
The Light is your Home, the Light is your Birthright at this moment.  And it is not necessary for you to work at it to get to it or experience it.  It is only necessary to desire it.  And a glad heart, a light heart will help to precipitate your movement into the light because a light heart, and joyful heart, and a grateful heart is territory into which your ego sense cannot enter.
PAUL:  This is me.  He’s reminding me of the fact that for years “Reader’s Digest” has had a section that says, “laughter is the best medicine.”  It’s that same thought. 
ANSWER:  Let up on yourself is what I am saying.  Do not assume that you have a hard road to hoe.  Assume that you can safely be idiotic enough to be happy under the circumstances or in the face of conditions that confront you.  And your willingness to be joyful and happy and idiotic will contribute to your world being transformed.  Because the only thing that contributes to the continuing in harmony is the fact that everybody is taking the ego seriously, and is wandering around trying to find the swimming pool when there isn’t one.  Dare to have fun!  Okay.
PAUL:  We have two people in the group who have not yet asked a question, so I’m going to do those first.  And then we’ll see whether there’s time for any more.
The first one is from Syrus, and he says, “there is according to folklore a large cash of buried gold in the Carmel area.  I would like to know if Raj will comment on this, not in the sense of a treasure hunt, but in the sense of the phenomena....and location....pin-pointed.
ANSWER:   No, there is not. 
PAUL:  Okay, this is me.  The picture that I was getting is that it’s like when boys get together and talk about the girls and make claims about their conquests.  The rumor about the cash of gold was a bragging sort of thing that was like a false claim to gain respect or to look good in everybody else’s eyes. 
Literally the image I get is like pirate type or boat type people drinking ale in a saloon or bar whatever they had at that time.  And it was a braggin sort of thing, except that it was done in a way that was quite convincing.  So for whatever that’s worth.  That was the dynamic of it.  Okay.
ANSWER:  If time is of the essence, then you had best let go of time.  The sense of time will create a sense of pressure that will interfere with your ability to clearly perceive what is actually needed.  Time is not of the essence, peace is.
PAUL:  This is me.  There is a set of books entitled “A Course In Miracles.”  There’s a statement—and I get the last word wrong, but it means much the same thing—the statement is:  “Infinite patience brings immediate results.”  And the sense of the meaning there is that when you let go of a sense of impatience it allows you to be more present in the now.  And because the now is where your fulfillment is occurring, the results of the evidence of that fulfillment is forth coming, let’s say much more rapidly.  He says....
ANSWER:  Do not be bluffed into anxiety by the threat of time.  This is very important to understand. 
PAUL:  I just posed the question which you had said, “is he on the right track?”  And Raj said, “yes, he is.” 
Do not assume that you need to be so structured in terms of obtaining material.  It is all around you.  And I encourage you to utilize serendipity, which is the discovery of that for which you are not looking.  If you want to find something, stop looking for it.  Relax in the knowledge that if you need it your Being has the capacity to bring it to your attention in a way that will be recognizable to you and in a way that you will not overlook. 
I want you to be willing to assume that the obtaining of material and structure for the material will come quite spontaneously if you will just be open to the fact that your Being is itself the creative principle in motion, and that it has the ability to be absolutely appropriate for the times and for the audiences.
There is much desire on your part regarding this project.  But there is also so much eagerness and impatience that there has evolved a great intensity that is not constituted of peace, and is turning everything into a project—tension producing work. 
Comedy is the expression of joyful insight.  Satire is the joyful expression of the the inconsistencies of the human condition that trigger in one way or another the release of the ridiculous dynamics so that change can occur.  Satirical comedy is a divine activity.  (this is the end of side one.)
I encourage you to back off on the intensity, back off on the attempt at structure.  Become alert for the unexpected ways in which you recognize the inconsistencies and the treatment of those inconsistencies that will convey transformationally the need for change.  And listen with your heart, else you would be likely to get heavy handed with the satire, where your heart will keep it balanced right on the razors edge.
Trust your heart more than your head.  And again let go of this sense of time, and the imperativeness of time.  I know you can explain to me why it is a valid concern.  But I am sharing with you unequivocally that it is a bluff of the ego and you do not need to respond.  This is one of those places where idiocy, the idiocy of not responding to obvious facts is essential. 
I reaffirm again, that if the sense of urgency is not released the light, joyful perspective needed in order to discern the inconsistencies will be overlooked, they will not register with you because of the preoccupying sense of time.  And you will defeat yourself unnecessarily.  Okay, that’s the end of the answer.
ANSWER:  Yes, it is some of the dirt work of the ego.  Concentration is a form of control.  It is a narrowing down of the attention, of the vision.  It is a form of effort.  Your lack of ability to concentrate is actually a progressive step unless somehow you manage to reestablish your ability to concentrate.  And you will have difficulty doing that because you are growing.  The only other alternative you have then is to let go and be open, as open as possible.  In fact, to be what you could call full opened consciousness is what puts you in the position of having available to you what you would hope to have available to you by means of your concentration.
Do not look at this as a problem, but actually as part of the solution of the problem of being.  Just because you cannot concentrate does not mean the knowledge is not available, that the knowing is not available it simply means that you’re having the opportunity to access the information or the knowing because it is an inherent part of your totality, and not as a result of the exercise of the skill of focusing your attention.  Have fun with that.
ANSWER:  You have just crossed over the threshold between 3 and 4, just into the beginning of the territory of 4.
PAUL:  Okay we do need to go ahead and get on with the healing session.  I explained earlier that each one of us has not only a spiritual guide but a group of individualities who work in conjunction with our guide in terms of the clarification of the perfection of our body.  My sense is that our guides work with us to...it’s sort of like the help wash the windows of our mind.  And the healing group works in terms of washing away the belief structures and so on that cover up and distort our experience of our body.
Neither your guide nor the healing group, or team, or whatever—I have had no way to know what they should really be called, so we just call them the healing team, somebody finally decided to call them the H team—that they cannot override your free will.  Therefore, if you have an investment in the problem you’ve asked them to deal with, and you’re not willing to give up the investment they cannot override you.
For instance I had a gentleman who had a back problem, but he was getting Workman’s Compensation for it.  He didn’t want the pain but he didn’t want to give up the Workman’s Comp.  And he did not get his healing.  Somebody else was getting Workman’s Comp and he said do everything but my back. 
Anyway, the point is they cannot override your free will.  So you are in charge the whole time.  At any time during the hour if you want work stopped all you have to say is, “please stop.”  You cannot be invaded or violated in the sense of even healing work being done that you don’t want done.  I want it to be very clear to you that you are not opening yourself up for any kind of control being exercised over you. 
If you have made a decision for your wellness they will facilitate that decision and carry it right through as far as you will allow it to be carried.  And so at all times you are in charge.  And I share that with you, not so that if you don’t get a healing it’s your fault, but to assure you that at all times you are in charge, you have the authority. 
And I think that’s very important to understand, cause there’s a lot of funny stuff that goes around about opening yourself up.  If you open yourself up you never know what kind of a spirit is going to enter in and all that kind of thing.  And Raj has made it very clear that there is no evil force, or there are no evil spirits.  And that when we seem to be experiencing something evil or negative, it is our fear being projected upon the energy of spirit, which is the only energy that there is, it’s the Life Principle, God.  So anyway, that’s one reason I’m pointing out to you that you’re in charge, and nothing will be done that you will not allow.  And you can call it to a stop at any point.
Now what we will do is for everybody to get comfortable, in whatever kind of a position—wait before you do it though—whatever would be comfortable for you for an hour.  As soon as everybody’s comfortable I will let you know when Raj says they are hear.  You may be able to sense when they arrive, I can’t, and I feel so foolish because I’m the one arranging for them to be here. 
But anyway, I will let you know when they are here.  And then all you need to do is in your mind just simply indicate what you would like them to work on.  If you have fifteen complaints that you would like them to address list them off, they will give priorities to what you have listed.  If everything can be done, great, but if it can’t, then of all that cannot be done they will work with the most serious things first.  I’m saying that so you don’t say, “well, maybe I ought to just ask only for one thing.”  Because if you have three or five or eight, go ahead and list them and let it be know that that’s what you would like help on.
Now, we don’t have a lot of husbands and wives here, but it is a rule in the healing sessions that I have like this, that snoring is okay if you fall asleep.  And so husbands or wives do not jab your partner if he or she starts snoring.  The reason is that during a healing session the... it is the state of consciousness that you’ll find that you’ll be in will be somewhat deeper and more significant.  This is my experience anyway.  And when there’s an elbow in the side it is far more jarring than at home in bed when it happens.  It is just very jarring.  Obviously it has happened to me.  So if it’s understood from the outset that this is allowed and it’s okay, those of you who might normally be disturbed will find you’re not as disturbed.  Just let it be and if you feel like giggling, giggle, but allow it.

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